Put in His Place

JP with Omni and Lorem

There were a lot of things she could say to hurt him right now.

Was she supposed to give up her life, her past, her job, her Gods, her desires? While he was being a child, staying the same, living in an idealistic fantasy. And while Voah wanted that world to be true, it wasn’t.

Should she have slept with men to make ends meet? Because no one else would give her a chance to work. Meanwhile he gave his money away? No kind strangers for her, no friends… other than two children.

Should she have sat in a hovel all day bored out of her mind? Living with a man that was terrified to lift a finger against injustice?

The discussion would have to wait and she hoped Gonyaul would come to realize on his own that he was in the wrong here. The others didn’t need to hear the bickering of their bitter romance.

It was incredibly difficult and she was hurt by his words, but she sat next to his face and touched it gently, trying to be as kind as she could.

“Gonyaul’Vaux. I want you to think through everything you have said to me this morning… take a look at yourself. You think scars make you a monster… you’ve never seen a monster.”

She turned to the others.

“I apologize for my outburst. I need a minute.”

She turned and walked out of the cave for a few minutes before returning in a calmer mood.

Gonyaul didn’t move from her touch. He truly wanted the meaningful connection with her so much. His chest was moving up and down with the intensity of the emotions he was discharging. It aggravated the wounds down his torso; however, it did not make him nearly as uncomfortable as Voah’s words. He wanted her to fight back so that he could spare with her. Instead she showed him kindness, something out of his playbook, and he was slapped across the face with how effective it was.

He inwardly took a look at himself.

She was right. And it made him mad that she was in fact so very right. It instantly shut him up and shut him down. He had no retaliation, no words to rebuttal with. Voah had turned a mirror onto him and he saw his reflection. He was being childish. He had been selfishly living in his fantasy world of idealistic harmony while intentionally keeping his head in the sand, as if not to see the tribulations of reality. He had been clueless to what Voah had been going through, was still going through.

He felt nauseas as the realizations caused a sick feeling in his gut; that and a present low blood sugar.

He wasn’t really mad at her it dawned on him. He was angry with himself. And instead of being responsible he had redirected it unfairly to her. His shame rose and with it his embarrassment for being unveiled and exposed in front of everyone.

After Voah left he was silent. He closed his eyes to shut out the room. When he did so a tear spilled out the angled corners down to the bandages across his face. When she returned he was calmer as well and very silent. The fight had gotten knocked out of him.