Sadness Walking

Time is an interesting thing. It is the most important resource that any living creature, bound by nature, finds itself in the possession of. How it is spent may be variable, but to those subject to be within time it has the first and final say about the start and the stop respectively. Gonyaul, as he sat sadly back inside their tent at the campsite by the river, was pondering if he had spent his time wisely with Voah.

It had been several days since she vanished without a trace. He had ventured each day in a different direction and returned, in both instances his hopes had to be shattered and born anew the next morning. Now he had exhausted all directions to even check, and he had gotten to the limit of his food and drink that would now be prudent for him to pack up camp and be on his way alone.

The very idea of what they were growing together having come to an end had him feelings a a mixture of joy and sadness. On the one hand, he could relive every moment in the now past and celebrate the gift it was to have been allowed to spend time with Voah. On the other hand, there was the future thinking realization that it was over and this brought with it deep tears with no witnesses.

Had he loved her well? Did he do everything in his power to serve her needs? Was he selfish in the use of his time or selfless? These were but a few of the many questions he got to ponder over the days. His conclusion was he wasn’t perfect, he fell short, but he dared to try. In reflection over his past he accurately assessed that in measuring himself he did not measure up to the standard of what ought to be and was left wanting. Yet in failing, in falling, he would fall forward and learn the valuable lessons that could be gleaned from the good instances and particularly the bad.

He realized that the future would be what happened in the present upon present. He needed to have another plan of action. Thus, Gonyaul spent the rest of the early evening packing up the entire camp, modifying things as necessary to carry. And with one longing look about the place, hoping again she would suddenly appear thought she didn’t, he turned and continued onward to the holy city by following the river.