Not the posters!

"I have to do WHAT?" asked Jacky in disbelief.

"This ship needs to seem like top of the line military-grade space corps. We need everyone to help out." said Jay.

"Has the thought occurred to you that maybe there aren't enough of us to pass off the illusion?" Jacky asked.

"We'll think of something, but for now, we need everyone to put on a performance." Jay said, almost begging with the Kong in front of him.

"Okay, fine." Jacky sighed. "but you may as well hide me."

"Why is that?" Jay asked.

Jacky snickered. "Jay, have you looked at me, physically, lately? I don't exercise. I haven't been to a gym for as long as I can remember. I'm scrawny. I'm bones, man. Skin and bones with long, unmanageable hair. You can't make me pass off as a soldier."

"You won't BE a soldier, Jacky." said Jay.

"...I won't?" Jacky asked. "What will I be?"

"You're going to be the ship's head scientist." Jay said.

Jacky paused. He began to grin.

"Head scientist. I like that. I think I can pull that off, Jay." Jacky said with some pride.

"Good. Now, about that hair..."

"You're not touching my hair." Jacky said, defensively.

"Space Corps regulations permit a certain length, Jacky. If we're going to pass off, every detail must be correct." Jay explained.

"...What's the regulation length?" Jacky asked, cautiously.

To demonstrate, Jay grabbed the mop of Jacky's hair, and bunched much of it into a single area.

"All this, off." Jay said.

"...Smeg...." Jacky said. "I've seen some smeg, but... smeg."

Suddenly, Plisken entered the room.

"What's up, guys?" he asked.

"We found a derelict, but we can't make it of any use unless we make this ship seem like a full military-grade cruiser." Jay explained.

"What do I do?" Plisken asked.

"You need to make it seem like you're an important military official." Jay explained.

the words "important military official" echoed in Plisken's ears.

"This is so exciting! I'm gonna go back to my quarters and get dressed!" Plisken yelled, giddish like a school girl.

"I guess I'll get changed, too." Jacky said, grumbling.
------------------------------------
*a little later*

Jacky shumbles into his quarters, only to be greeted with Justin rummaging around.

"What are you doing here?" Jacky asked.

"Jay told me to." Justin explained.

"Why would he do that?" Jacky asked, desperately.

"To make the ship seem more official, like he said. Regulations dictate that officers of similar rank must share quarters."

"Similar rank?!" Jacky steamed. "You are no scientist!"

"No, but I'm an Engineer. As of 5 minutes ago, Head Engineer." Justin smirked.

Jacky sat on the bed in disbelief.

"This is going to be one hell of a week..." he said. "What are you doing?" he asked, noticing that his precious Lord of the Rings poster was being removed from its place.

"I have to take down your stupid fantasy poster to put my poster up." Justin explained, whipping out a large pin-up of Marilyn Monroe.

"I spent 50 dollarpounds on that poster, Pancake!" Jacky yelled. "It's autographed by Peter Jackson!"

"Well I spent 10 dollarpounds on this poster, which was GOING to get Marilyn Monroe's autograph!" Justin yelled. "Until we... you know..."

Jacky felt a little guilty, but still indignant.

"Fine. Put it up for now." Jacky said. "HEY! Now what are you doing?!"

Justin was removing his carefully placed Back to the Future poster, as well as the Highlander poster next to it.

"Gotta make room for my life-sized poster of Marilyn." Justin said, placing it where the posters used to be.

"Quit with the Marilyn Monroe fetish!" Jacky growled.

Justin began reaching toward Jacky's last poster.

"Don't you DARE touch my Evil Dead poster. I paid 65 Dollarpounds to get Bruce Cambell AND Sam Raimi's autograph. You can put your stupid Marilyn Monroe poster in the BATHROOM." Jacky seethed as he said.

"...The BATHROOM!" Justin yelled, happily. "You're right, that is a much better place for it!"