*ACTION* Peaceful negotiations

Who:- Jay, Drive room staff
Where:- Drive Room
When:- then
 
Jay sat as his desk among a large pile of paperwork. He didn't like paperwork. He despised paperwork. If he could, he'd launch all the paperwork for the entire ship out of the airlock, because then he wouldn't be sat here signing requisition forms for a new box of paperclips for the Chief engineer, which would be used to attach more paperwork to some more paperwork and end up eventually as more paperwork for Jay to do later.
 
He lazily signed another form, then almost another, until he realised that it was from Doctor Keto requesting permission to prescribe Euthanasia to hypochondriacs, or the generally annoying. Jay stamped the form with the 'request denied' stamp and quickly typed up a new  ship-wide order that all personell who so much as break a nail must report IMMEDIATELY to the chief medical officer for a full examination and they weren't to leave until Keto was suitably annoyed.
 
At least he attempted to, but his computer shut itself down, and Jay, realised that he hadn't hit 'save' in a while sighed deeply, threw his mouse across the room, kicked the filing cabinet, took a deep breath, and methodically lifted the 2-foot high stack of forms from his "out" tray and back into his "in" tray.
 
Suitably infuriated he exited his office and stepped out into the Drive Room.
 
"Status?" he asked the ops officer lazily, as he tried to convince the coffee machine to refill his cup with the strongest stuff it had.
"Still where we were Captain.." replied the officer.
"Figured that. propulsions offline..but what's happening elsewhere" Jay replied, smacking the coffee machine as it sputtered before shutting down. "AHH, FOR THE LOVE OF SMEG!" he yelled "This power shortage is really trying my patience now!"
"Lt. Zodar called about that sir..."
"and?"
"They need replacement parts. Cargo bay's are empty of anything they can use to fix the problem, guess the re-fitters after the Krylon War used it all up."
"More like they smegging stole it..." Jay muttered. "We can't go on like this! Are we in communications range of Mollopod still, maybe they can provide us with replacement parts?"
"Can't tell sir!" the navigation officer replied "We've drifted quite a way, but the navi-comp's offline..."
"Whaddya need the navi-comp for?" Jay said incredulously "you're a navigator! so NAVIGATE!"
He went to sit back in his chair, but fell against it's centre leg, looking up he remembered that it was still two metres into the air.
"....forcryingoutloud..." he muttered, and got back to his feet.
"Look" he said to the navigator, who he presumed was new aboard as he'd never seen him before, and if anyone should know the Navigation staff, it would be him. "That constellation there, what is it?" he said, pointing out the forward view port
"Erm...I...I'm not sure..."
Jay rubbed his temples.
"It's Pyxis" he said, "Which means that THAT constellation is what?"
"Mars?"
"MARS IS A PLANET!! IN THE SOL SYSTEM!" Jay snapped "It's Antila!"
"Riiiiiight...."
"So that places us where?"
"Space..."
Jay smacked his forehead and ran his hand down his face. "Yes." he said flatly "Of COURSE it's space...but WHERE in Space?"
"OH!" said the Navigator suddenly "Within the Vela system!"
"Well done" said Jay "So..are we in communications range of Mollopod?"
"Yes!" 
"THANK YOU!!" he turned to the ops officer "Open a channel"
"We can't..."
"WHY?"
"Communications are down!"
"Then re-route power from somewhere else!"
"Like where?"
"How about the "Drive room staff's brain's!" They're clearly non-essential system's!" 
The officer tried to speak, but couldn't and simply tapped a  command into her console. "Re-routing from the hair-dryers in the salon on the Promenade..."
"THANK YOU!"
"Not that that's a non-essential system..I'm meant to be having highlights done......" she caught a glimpse of Jay's scowl aimed in her direction in a reflection in her monitor.
"Erm..channel open..sir..."
"Apophallation master!" Jay said "This is Captain Chrysler of the JMC Blue Dwarf requesting assistance."
"No reply sir..."
Jay frowned.
"Apophallation master, do you read?"
Nothing
"Mollopod homeworld are you receiving?"
"We're reading loud and clear Blue Dwarf. We have dispatched an armada to intercept you. Leave our space immediately
 or you will be destroyed"
"Wait..what?" Jay asked "What about the alliance?"
"ALLIANCE!" replied Mollopod command. "YOU BROKE THAT WHEN YOUR PEOPLE ATTACKED US!"
"What are you talking about? We never attacked you!"
"Then how do you explain this!"
"Receiving video footage sir.." said the ops officer.
"On screen.."
The video played, and showed dozens of landing craft landing on the various Mollopod colonies, from the looks of it they'd invaded, and were now occupying all but a handful of Mollopod planets, Mollopod Prime - they're homeworld was one of the few un-invaded.
Jay kept watching. "Can you zoom in?" he asked the ops officer "Identify the attackers?"
She nodded and the screen zoomed in to show the attacking forces.
"Humans?" Jay said in shocked reaction.
"HUMANS!" replied Mollopod command "AND NOW YOU PLEAD FOR HELP?"
"I assure you" Jay said "The Space Corp. Have sanctioned no attacks on your territory! We value our alliance!"
"Then prove it!" Came the reply. "Either you help us to fight these invaders, or we'll destroy your vessel......."
"Sir.." said the ops officer "I've identified the attackers...it's the Amnesty International army..."
"They don't give up do they..." Jay said, remembering how they had attacked the Mollopods for their 'crimes against humanity' at the end of the Krylon war
"Chrysler to Major Harris...form as many away teams as you can and prepare them to land on the Mollopod colonies
"But what about Hyemnthrope?"
"Arm anyone who stays aboard, they can hunt it down..but for now..we're going to war...."
 
<Tag everyone! We need the Mollopods help, and we need to prevent war with them by keeping the alliance...but remember, BLue Dwarf's in no condition to fight, so we have do it the old fashioned way......>