Somewhere far away... (part one)

Who: CK Kochanski
When: no idea
Where: no idea
A deserted beach, far away from the cosmic worlds where alien women were curently greasing themselves in raspberry jelly. On the white sands layed a passed out Scotsman, unshaven and unwashed. How long he'd been there? He didnt know. Standing up and blinking he looked at his surroundings. Blue ocean, an island paradise and across the bay a burning wreckage of a starbug... 
"OK, who let me have the keys with a hangover like... Huh? Guys?" He staggered around in a circle before realising he was alone. "Chris? Phil? Efof? "  he shouted the names in desperation but there was no reply... He tried to think, the events which led him here... The last thing he could remember was leaving Blue Dwarf on an epic quest to find who he was... With Mel. Mel? A vauge memory came back to him, a woman who had tried to help him find his identity... "MEL!!!" Callum dived into the waters trying to swim out to the wreck of starbug, praying she was still alive. But it was to far away. On returning to the beach he collapsed and began to sob "I killed her... I killed her"
"No you didn't"
"Yes I did, i killed her!" Callum paused for a moment.... "Wait" He looked up to see him self in shadow. Standing above him was a man, a big man... An incredibly HUGE fat man with long curly hair. "Who are you?"
"I am a figment of your imagination." The man replied.
"Okay... Now who are you REALLY"
"I'm STILL a figment of your imagination" Callum couldnt be bothered to argue with the stranger.
"Where's Mel?"
"She's safe..."
"Then where is she?"
"She's on the otherside...
"OK mate," Callum said getting pissed off. "The other side of what?"
"The Hatch"
Several hours later CK and 'that fat bloke' were running through the deep jungle dodging arrows and bullets and some wierd shaddow monster. Callum had no idea what was going on but it all seemed so familiar to him. He ran through the dangers intent to find Mel, whatever was going on he had to find her, she'd tried to help him and this is where he'd got her. Moments later the two men reached a clearing. A circuler clearing within the jungle, at the centre of which apeared to be a large 'hatch' in the ground.
"Is this where Mel went?" He asked, examining the entrance to the metal hatch.
"Yeah but dude, you dont wanna go down there... Look at the numbers!"
"01322 562001... Yeah it's an idian takeaway in glasgow"
"No dude, wait..." But it was too late as Callum climbed through the hatch never to see the island again....
"I have to find Mel!"
<<<TO BE CONTINUED>>>    

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