Efof - \"I\'m dating a Freak!\" pt2

<snip>
"Hold on." Said Barf. "So your girlfriend is going to fight every
other girl aboard over YOU?"
Efof nodded.
"Then why the hell are you stood around here with your hands in your
pockets – when you could be following them and watching!" he slapped
Efof on the shoulder and ran after the girls. Efof's eyes glowed as he
realised the gravity and followed on.
<end snip>
Who: Efof, Barf, MK9 and lots of wrestling girls
Where: Cargo-deck of MK9's Ffionian ship
When: After last post
Fferna had stripped down to her underwear, not ashamed anymore to only
have the same amount of breasts as humans. She wrestled girl after
girl in the warm jelly and knocked them back, each making her a lot
more fierce. All this was fuelled by her desire to be with Efof, and
also her deep desire to prove that she wasn't a freak after all, but
an independent, respected individual. Wresting the entire crew in
jelly was a probably a daft way to prove this, but it was ancient
Ffionian tradition.
"This is wrong." Said Barf.
"Very wrong." Nodded Mk9.
"Yup." Said Efof.
All three stood motionless and transfixed on the wrestling.
"We should stop them." Said Efof.
"Agreed." Said Mk9.
"Yup." Said Barf.
Neither of them moved.
"I just want to see what she does to the broad shouldered girl with
the huge knockers." Efof said. "Then we should put a stop to it."
They all cringed. Then cheered.
"Okay, okay, okay." Efof said, stepping into the group of women to
break them up. "That'll do. You don't really need to do this to prove
anything. It's great and everything… I mean… I'm not complaining
because this really IS brilliant, but mostly it's just a waste of
perfectly good jelly."
Fferna smiled at him, her hair all matted with clumps of jelly. Efof
resisted the urge to lick it all off her face. He did secretly hope
that later he could chase her around with a spoon, but didn't dare ask
in case she thought that was just a bit too weird.
Suddenly, a voice came over the tannoy. It was Jay.
"Mk9 what the hell is going on with your ship, you almost swerved into
us at half light-speed. Normally I would blame Dean, but he's here
with me!"
There was a quiet "hello" from Dean in the background.
"Oh Jesus, we left the Bridge unmanned!" Said Mk9 and ran back to it.
They found Rika alone on the bridge trying to press several buttons at
once on separate computers. "The lights… they won't stop flashing!"
she said all flustered but doing her best to keep the ship in a
straight line.
Jelly-covered Ffionians took over and the ship straightened up again.
<OOC - Tag anyone?>
--- In JMC_Blue_Dwarf@yahoogroups.com, "Onion" <theonion770@...> wrote:
>
> Who: Efof, Mk8, Rika, Barf and lots of hot alien girls
> Where: Mk9's ship
> When: After Rika and barf boarded the ship
>
> <snip>
> Efof sprinted into the room, covering his eyes as he did so hoping to
> avoid the gaze of the 4-breasted women. All this really accomplished
> however, was him knocking over both Barf and Rika, and then
> subsequently falling into the custard.
> "Mk.9! You'll never believe this!"
> <end snip>
>
> Efof was flapping around the room in so much distress that Rika had to
> slap him to get him to calm down.
>
> "It's Fferna….." he said. "She's… she's…. a FREAK!"
>
> Everyone gasped, and Efof got a lot of accusing glances.
> "How do you mean? she looks fine to me." Said Mk9. "Apart from she
> didn't take her top off… there are strict rules on my ship!" He looked
> accusingly at Rika who was still rebelling against his order and
> keeping her clothes on. She fired him back an angry look and crossed
> her arms.
>
> "She's only got… two breasts!" Efof said loudly and all the dumb
> blonde Ffionians in the room gasped. There were murmurings of "poor
> girl" and "I'm glad I'm not as deformed as she is".
>
> "What do I do… she's really nice and everything but…" he shuddered.
> "How could I be with anyone THAT deformed?!"
>
> "Efof listen… you've been around Humans for a long time now…" said
> Mk9. "I thought you would have gotten used to… you know…"
>
> "What?" Efof said blankly.
>
> "You know, human girls only have two."
>
> Efof gasped. "Really? Oh my gods!" he put his hand to his mouth and
> stared at Rika's chest, who instantly became self conscious and
> uncomfortable from his stare.
>
> "I never noticed. You mean all this time they've been parading around
> with only two? Oh my gods, that's horrible!" Efof cringed as he
> thought of it. "All those women… eugh, I've been surrounded by freaks!"
>
> Mk9 laughed. "Surely you would have noticed? On Tv? Films?"
> "I always turn away for the romantic stuff."
> "What about when we've been to the beach and the female crewmembers
> wear bikinis."
> "It's rude to stare too much."
> "What about the lapdancing joints down the far end of the Promenade?"
> "It's dark."
> "What about…. Oh I give up." Mk9 admitted eventually.
>
> "So what do I do?" Efof almost throttled the robot for help.
> "Well do you like her?"
> "What you mean the freak?"
> "Yes… I mean NO! She's not a freak! Well apart from the fact her
> birthing organs are on the top of her head she's NOT a freak… much."
>
> Efof was getting mixed signals. "So you're saying I should still be
> nice to her."
> "Probably… look, I'm not a Ffionian, or a human, I have no idea what
> you should do. Ask one of these two." He pointed a robotic hand to
> Barf and Rika, who both instantly turned away, not wanting to get
> involved.
>
> "I suppose two aren't that bad." Efof curiously tried to poke Rika in
> the chest, but she angrily slapped him away. "Don't even think about
> it!" she said. Efof gave her a look like a sad kitten, curious and
> innocent.
>
> Efof nodded, smiled and walked confidently back towards the exit. He
> was going to go back and tell Fferna that it didn't matter if she was
> a freak, she was HIS freak.
>
> But before he reached the exit. A flustered Fferna came through the
> door. "I invoked the ritual of Tsiboukoparakaliari!"
>
> There were gasps. Mk9, Barf and Rika looked around in confusion. It
> had obviously caused a stir because even the women who had previously
> been fighting in custard were now getting up and paying attention.
>
> "The ritual of Tsiboukoparakaliari?" Efof said. "Why? That's crazy!
> It's an ancient ritual that hasn't been invoked in thousands of years!"
> "Actually we used it last Tuesday." Said one girl. "It helps settle
> rows between quarrelling couples."
>
> Efof sagged his shoulders and put his hands in his pockets.
>
> "Okay so what happens in this ritual of Tsi…boo..pap…a..whatsit
> exactly?" Asked Mk9.
> "The ritual of Tsiboukoparakaliari. Fferna has to fight all the girls
> on the ship for… my affection." Efof said. "In raspberry jelly."
>
> All the girls started to run off the bridge, it was clear that the
> ritual was going to be held somewhere else on the ship.
>
> "I really didn't want this much of a fuss…" Efof weakly shouted after
> them.
>
> "Hold on." Said Barf. "So your girlfriend is going to fight every
> other girl aboard over YOU?"
> Efof nodded.
> "Then why the hell are you stood around here with your hands in your
> pockets – when you could be following them and watching!" he slapped
> efof on the shoulder and ran after the girls. Efof's eyes glowed as he
> realised the gravity and followed on.
>
> This left only Rika and Mk9 on the Bridge of the ship, and very soon
> Mk9 was following also.
>
> Rika stood on the empty bridge and stared at the stars flying past.
> "So who's going to fly this ship? Hello? …. Hello?!!"
>
> Meanwhile in Keto's ship, which was at the rear of the fleet, a
> tormented man dressed as the Joker noticed as one of the ships in
> front of them was veering dangerously close to the other.
>
> <OOC - tag anyone!>
>