JP - Cat and Pig on an Adventure!

<She’s coming home soon… maybe even today!> Whiskers squirmed unhappily.

<I know you heard Kiana on the phone, Whiskers. I did too…> Herbert replied. If he was being honest, he missed Evie too. She was like a little ray of sunshine for everyone in the house and gave Kiana something to focus on. She always fussed over Evie as if she were a daughter to her. <I want to go out and find Evie. Want to come with me?>

Whiskers angrily chewed on the loose cuffs of Herbert’s pants, growling his denial before flopping on the floor in defeat. <Yes. I can find her better than them.>

Herbert nodded. <We just have to either convince Gregor to help us or sneak out without him knowing.>

<Sneaking out without him is easy.> Whiskers said. <Just walk out.>

<In the storm outside? He’ll think we’re nuts.> Herbert retorted.

<He’s a human. They don’t think very much. Especially if you take his car.> Whiskers reasoned.

<He keeps his keys on him at all times, Whiskers!> Herbert seethed, getting up and finding a raincoat to wear.

<Don’t male humans take off their pants before using their litterbox?> Whiskers asked. He was not sure, he kind of ignored Sorley unless he was handling interesting food.

<What? Yes, but I’m looking for something to keep the rain off me. I kind of don’t want to end up soaked again. If we’re gonna get out of here, we need to prepare…unless you’d rather get wet?> Herbert gave him a pointed look.

<I must not get wet. Bring the car to the door.> Whiskers instructed.

Herbert forced Whiskers into a cat raincoat. “Nope, you’re stuck running around with me, you little shit.” He grinned and went to the nearest window while in the raincoat and carrying Whiskers, sneaking outside into the storm.

Whiskers dug his claws into Herbert, freaking out at every raindrop. <SAVE ME GODDESS!>

<You’re not getting wet, dude!> Herbert said, doing all he could to ignore the claws as they reached the car and he got them in. Thankfully, Gregor didn’t lock the doors and the pig-man had watched enough videos on how to hotwire a car that he believed he could do it.

Whiskers stood on the passenger seat with his forepaws on the dash. <Hurry!>

“Give me a minute,” Herbert said as he worked the wires and got the car roaring to life. Thankfully, Gregor’s car wasn’t stick-shift, so he just had to put it into drive and figure out where the lights were in order to drive away. “So, where should we go first?” He asked as he struggled a bit to get steady, but soon figured it out…sort of. He wasn’t hitting anything, at least.

<Where Evie is.> Whiskers thought it was obvious.

“I don’t fuckin’ know!” Herbert said as he slowed the car down at a stop sign.

<Why are you stopping? She's not here!> Whiskers yowled.

“It’s a stop sign, idiot!” Herbert yelled. “As a human, I’m stuck following their fucking rules!”

<Why? It’s a sign! It can really stop you!> Whiskers pointed out.

“The police can stop me and arrest me and they’ll put you in a shelter where they’ll probably kill you!” Herbert retorted.

<What the fuck? Why the hell would they ever do that?!> Whiskers asked and hid in the footwell.

“Because they’re assholes.” Herbert grumbled and followed the road. He really had no clue where he was going…

<Fuck the police!> Whiskers hissed.

<We do anything to the police and they’ll shoot us with those guns of theirs. You know, the ones that can blow out brains and stop hears…> Herbert explained as he took another turn and found them on a long stretch of unfamiliar road. No one else was around and the rain just kept pouring down on the car…

<Where the hell are you taking me?> Whiskers asked, looking out the window unhappily.

<I don’t know…I just wanted to find Evie.> Herbert said just before something huge slammed into the side of the car, sending them rolling off the road and into some tall grass where it stopped on the driver’s side. It swung slightly, but didn’t fall in either direction. In the chaos of the hit, Herbert got hit by glass and hit his head. “Ugh…” He groaned, unconscious.

<Wake up you stupid asshole!> Whiskers yowled, scratched and chomped on Herebert’s arm. <Let me out!>

Heavy footfalls could barely be heard over the pouring rain as something large stepped around the car. A deep growling soon followed and whatever was outside the car shoved it onto its roof. Glass tumbled and metal groaned, but Herbert was unconscious and there was a nasty bleeding cut on the side of his head.

<Fuck!> Whisker bit and pulled on Herbert’s ear. <Wake the fuck up you stupid pig!>

<He’s not going to wake up, cat.> The creature’s voice was deep and growling as it lowered its head to peer into the car. <I’m just here to collect him. You can run along.>

<He’s my driver!> Whiskers possessively sat on Herbert’s chest.

<Poor foolish little kitty…> The creature’s chuckle was sinister as large claws reached in toward Herbert and Whiskers.

That was when the pig man groaned again and blinked, trying to see past the blurriness that took over his vision. He could feel Whiskers, but also something sharp pulling at his arm. “What the-oh, shit!” He said, seeing the beast and pulling his arm free. The claws cut his arm, causing fresh blood to spill to the roof of the car. “What the fuck?!”

Quickly getting the seatbelt off, Herbert fell and scrambled out the driver side window, picking up Whiskers as he did so. “Run!” He told the cat, tossing him forward as a large tail wrapped around his own torso. “RUN!” He yelled louder as he got pulled back, disappearing into the darkness and rain.

Whiskers hissed and ran away from the car and into the rain in a panic. The poor cat had no idea of where he was or where to go.

Luckily for him, a few of the dogs were trying to follow and he slammed right into one of them. <Cat! Cat! It’s the cat! We found them! Get the human! The human! Cat!>

<A giant monster took the stupid pig man!> Whiskers told the dogs.

<Monster> One gasped.

<We gotta tell Gregor! Monster! Monster!>

One of the dogs picked up Whiskers in his mouth gently and they rushed back to the farm.

<Put me down!> Whiskers hissed at the indignity.