RE: [JMC_Blue_Dwarf] Niples \"Thats NOT champagne!\"

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Suddenly and rather dramatically, Chris Harris burst into Parrotts again this time brandishing something long in his hand. "I have it!"Jay squinted. "That's a carrot you tit!"Chris looked at it. "Ahh, so it is."<End snip>
 
"Where do we get 'em from anyway Cap'n?!" Jay asked his wife.
"Cap'n?" she said, wondering if this was a new 'bedroom' name for her
"THOMAS TO CHRYSLER!" came over the comm, interuppting Jay's train of thought.
"Go ahead Dean"
"you know how I said about the Pirates in the shuttlebay?!"
"Uh-huh"
"Well they're kinda nicking the shuttles!"
"Well stop them!!"
"I'M TRYING!!!! I NEED SOME HELP!!"
"Ok I'll be there as soon as I can!" Jay turned to Niples "You were there a minute ago! Why didnt you try and stop them!!"
"Im a royal amb!.."
"I know what you are Seymour....but its too impolite for a family RPG.."
"RPG?!" Seymour said confused...
"Phil!" Jay shouted "Need a security team to the shuttlebay!!"
"You'll be lucky..they're all fighitng pirates elsewhere....or drunk.." he nodded toward one of his 'grunts' unconcious with an empty bottle of Jack Daniels in his hand. 
 
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-----Original Message-----From: Onion [mailto:theonion770@...]Sent: 13 June 2004 14:48To: JMC_Blue_Dwarf@yahoogroups.comSubject: [JMC_Blue_Dwarf] Niples "Thats NOT champagne!"OOC- sorry for the onfusion people, Chris did base his post on an idea I had, but the bleeding champagne bit wasn't mine, and admittedly was a bit out there. But Efofs an alien and we could run with it anyhow :-)<really silly snip>after the rest of the pirates in parotts had been killed,everybody on that heard the conversation, started to walk out ofparrots and followed the trail of champagne down the corridor, with aload of ice with them, so that when they found it, the chief medicalofficer could attach it back to his forehead, without much pain, just so that everybody could still call him a dickhead!!(but the downside is that they wont get anymore freechampagne!!)<end snip>Who: Seymour Niples, Amber, Efof, everyone else in ParrottsWhere: ParrottsWhen: When Parrotts had been cleared of piratesSeymour struggled through the door dragging a collapsed Amber. "Some help here please!" He said. Jay helped him get her onto a cleared table. "Why didn't you take her to sickbay?" asked Jay. Owen Numan the barman came and brought some towels to stop Ambers bleeding wound."We were down in the flight deck. The lift was guarded with those nasty pirate ruffians, this was the quickest place to get to.""We'll have to turn this place into a temporary sickbay, Efof is injured too." He pointed to Efof who was pacing up and down like a madman in the corner."By jove! What's wrong with the alien whipper-snapper?""He's had his…. Pride injured."Niples raised an eyebrow and winced. "Oh dear."The Ambassador approached Efof, who was still grasping his head. "Efof calm down and lets get a bandage on that… area… of yours, your bleeding everywhere."Some more people approached Efof with glasses to catch his blood.Niples batted them away. "Good god people, what the hell are you doing?"Suddenly people started to look ashamed. "Its…champagne.. he bleeds champagne…""My god, are you people sick?! It's his blood! Whether it tastes like champagne or not. Go on, get out of my sight!"People moaned and walked away slowly, and Seymour picked up some emergency bandages from the bar. He really didn't want to touch Efofs bleeding… appendage so looked around. He saw Tara fussing over Amber."Tara thank god, can you help me a minute, Efof is loosing a lot of blood…""I'm very busy at the minute Seymour can you bandage it up for me. Or at least apply pressure to stop the bleeding."Seymour looked at Efofs head. "Erm… I would really ..erm… rather not touch him…""Don't be such a baby!" Tara called over."Baby! How dare you, I'm a Royal Amb-""Just get on with it!" Tara snapped.At arms length, and with much disgust on his face. Seymour quickly bandaged Efofs bleeding head. A small drop of his blood spurted out into his face and trickled onto Seymour's lips."Oh my god, that's disgusting!" Seymour backed away. "Oh.. but it DOES taste like champagne…. What am I saying, its not even GOOD champagne- and it's sick!""its okay," Said Efof. "Its like when I went to London zoo and I got cut, and they drank my blood… and my parents saved me…""Efof you're rambling like a madman, you've lost too much blood. You've only ever been to London twice! One in the Plebe attack and the other time in 1984, remember that crazed TV presenter Timmy Mallot…""But my parents saved me…" He insisted, in a delirious ramble."Sorry Efof but your parents died over 1000 years ago, remember the Hymenoptera attack. You're delirious!"Suddenly and rather dramatically, Chris Harris burst into Parrotts again this time brandishing something long in his hand. "I have it!"Jay squinted. "That's a carrot you tit!"Chris looked at it. "Ahh, so it is."...Protecting the universe from the scum of the Earth...www.BlueDwarf.co.uk-View the Blue Dwarf guide to the galaxy!Your number one resource in all things Blue Dwarf related!