Niples \"Les Royal Niples\"

<SNIP>
Making a hasty retreat back through the mini wormhole, he appeared
in a fancy restaurant. "Jings, this thing's jumping all over the
place"
Unfortunately for Canazza, Seymour Niples happened to be dining in
that restaurant at the very moment he popped in. and he wasn't very
happy to see him.
<END SNIP>
"Mr Canazza!!" Seymour Bellowed.
"Urm... Mr Nipples" Canazza said, eying up the exit.
"Thats Ambassador to you, and its Niples, emphasis on the I!"
"Right, um... sorry"
"I'd like to talk to you about the two very expensive ming vases
that were broken in my suite last night"
"Dean and Jay did it!!!" Canazza said on impulse. In fact they
actually had. Seymour took this as a valid excuse and turned back to
his soup.
"Indeed, you are just lucky today that the Queen came or you would
have been in serious trouble. Where is she by the way?"
"Buying boyband CD's I think, she's a bit… immature."
"I trust you were a gentleman when you escorted her to the cinema?"
Canazzas eyes widened. "She attacked me after the trailers, she was
all over me! I kinda… ran away!"
"You refused the company of Her Majesty the Queen?!" Seymour stood
up and drew the attention of the entire restaurant.
"She was definitely no lady!"
Seymour sighed and took another sip of soup. And almost spat it out.
He dabbed himself furiously with a napkin.
"The cuisine in this restaurant is terrible!" Is there nowhere on
this ship that serves anything decent? I'm going to complain to the
chef!!!"
Canazza stook around for curiosity's sake and follwed Seymour into
the kitchen where another rogue wormhole was connecting the urinal
in gents lav on deck 86 directly into the soup boiling on the stove.
"This is OUTRAGEOUS!!!" Seymour shouted and threw a handy pan at a
nearby chef.
"I'l um.. try and get the wormhole drive fixed as soon as possible
ambassador" Said Canazza trying to sneak out before he was hit by a
flying pot or pan.
"Eh? No I'm talking about the state this kitchen is in, dirty
floors, cutlery arrange by size, not by function, and a coliflour
that is clearly more than 3 days old- CALL THAT FRESH!!! What
wormhole by the way?"
"Erm, nothing!" Canazza said.
"I can cook better than this!" Seymour said donning an apron and
showing some foreign chefs how it is best to cut carrots. "No you're
stirring that soup the wrong way around... no no, you're tossing the
salad all wrong! And what are you doing to that duck a-l'orange, you
have to baste her, BASTE!!!"
The chefs looked around sheepish.
"I can do much better than this, hang on a second- I know what I
must do, I must open up a restaurant!!!"
He called Canazza back. "Canazza!!! Find me an empty space on the
promenade and arrange a sign to be made!"
"Me? Erm.. I'm an engineer not a printer!"
"Do it Canazza!" Seymour glared.
Canazza looked around. "Well `Le Regal De Mackenzies' next door has
been closed for a while, maybe you can take over that?"
"That I will do!!!" Seymour pointed a finger in the air and shouted,
much to the annoyance of the other people in the restaurant. "And as
I am a Royal Ambassador it will be a royal restaurant, as long as it
is approved by the Queen – CANAZZA! Go and get it approved by the
Queen!"
Canazza stuck his head out of the restaurant. "SEYMOUR WANTS TO KNOW
IF HE CAN OPEN UP A RESTAURANT IN YOUR NAME!!!"
A small voice came back from the nearest trashy clothes shop.
"She says its okay." He said.
"JOLLY GOOD!" Said Seymour, shouting due to excitement. People
started complaining and leaving the restaurant. Seymour stood on the
table to make a speech.
"Yes, dear people- you should leave! For the food here is
substandard, and soon to be outdone by… by…. Canazza think of a
name!"
Canazza thought for a moment then a smile came on his face. "How
about Les Royal Niples?"
"EXCELLENT!!! You got my name in there too, very very good boy!"
Seymours ego was building through the roof.
"Boy? I'm twenty five!"
"Quiet boy! I'm thinking…. `Les Royal Niples'... it has a kind of
ring to it"
Canazza sniggered.
Seymour got down from the table after knocking over a wine glass,
but he didnt mind- his head was full of new oppertunities. He walked
off rather briskly to set up his new restaurant.