Sheemoor's Parshty

Alota hadn't been to enthusiastic to go to Seymour's Barn Dance, Jay had been even less so, but she has insisted, in the interest of politeness that they went.
She's also given Jay a direct order to make a good example from the senior officers to the rest of the crew, and therefore be on his best behaviour.
 
'Easy' Jay thought "Of course honey" he had said "I'll stick to the soft drinks all night" he had promised "And I'll even help clean up afterwards"
 
 
This however had gone out the airlock the minute Phil had arrived with lager.
 
Jay and Phil were now completley and utterly bladdered drinking a lethal mixture of every kind of alcohol they could get they're hands on, out of Seymours matching pair of priceless ming vases.
 
Dean held up the stopwatch, "and go!" he slurred. Phil and Jay started to down a vaseful of some alcoholic concotion, when Alota came over. "Jay..." she said threateningly, Jay spluttered and put down his vase. Phil drained his. "And Phil is the winner! yellded Dean, leaping up to shake Phil's hand...then he saw Alota, "Oh, right..." Dean whistled, innocently.
"You!" said Alota, pointing at Jay, "and you!" she pointed at Dean, "What?" he asked innocently.
"Well, not only do you get my husband drunk, against my orders! But also! To abandon your girlfriend when she's depressed as hell to play some silly drinking game...!"
"Wait!" Dean said, "Let me explain...! I went over to Jas, but she gave me that look." Altoa glared at him. "Yes! That's it! Perfect!" said Dean, grinning at Alota. "You've got it just right!"
"Hacshuly Honey.." Jay slurred, "Ooh..look a peanut.., Dean didnt get me drunksh...thish did!" he picked up the vase, which promptly slipped through his fingers and smashed into a million pieces as it hit the floor. "Whoops...broke the flower pot..."
Phil just started giggling insanely, booze flowing from his nostrils.
 
"That" said Alota, slowly, "was a priceless Ming Vase."
"That's alright then. If it was one of Owen's pint mugs we'd have been dead." giggled Phil.
"WE'll hide the pieces." slurred Dean,
"Yeah." said Jay, "quick, put them in here!" "Your pocket?" said Alota, raising an eyebrow.
"Women have handbags. Men have pockets." pointed out Dean. "absolutshly, absolutshly..." concurred Phil, beforing throwing up inside the other vase.
"Women also have that..." said Jay
"What?
He pointed at his spouse "AAAAHhh yes the look..."
Phil leant over at Jay and whispered drunkenly "Psst..mate..she's a little TOO good at that..I feel SO sorry for you"
"Wheres the pool table?" Jay blurted randomly, he hadn't yet clicked that a hangover wasn't gonna be the only thing he had to worry about come morning.
"It's ok." said Dean, "the pool table's in Parrotts." "Whash good is that?" asked Phil. "I dunno." said Dean, "he just asked where it was." "True." said Phil, "Argh!" Jay yelled, collapsing back to the flwa from his sitting position. "Whash?" asked Phil, again. "I think he realised about Alota..."
"So do I," said Alota, hiking her eyebrow even further. "Go on..." said Dean, "Have a drink..." he brandished a glass at Alota, "not bloody likely, last time I drank something you gave me I nearly died!"
"DEAN YOU ASSHOLE!!" Jay yelled "YOU KILLED MY WIFE?!"
"NO Jay...I'm right here.."
"Oh.."
"You know what would make tonightsssshh even more fun?" Phil slurred.
"What?"
"MORE BOOZSSH"
 
JP 'twain Dean "Passh the Whishky" Thomasshhh and Jay "Besht Behaviour" Chryshler
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