OT: From SE4 list

It's from the Space Empires IV list. A bit of comic relief.
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--------- Forwarded message ----------
From: "Hymirl" <A.Cameron@...>
To: SE4@egroups.com
Date: Sun, 12 Nov 2000 17:06:02 GMT
Subject: [SE4] OT; (moderatly) comical relief.
Message-ID: <E13v0a5-0000br-00@...>
Greetings, as whose who have been here a while may know I
occasionally use outstanding events to write a little utter drivel
and increaseing the amount of pointless off topic babble in the list.
Since being (officially) list jester I belive this is a serious post
indeed. If you are fortuate to be mentioned in here just remember its
all lies and totally made up on the spot by myself.
Anyhow please allow me to present list chronical XII: 'Ban
this trash'
SCENE 1
[Moderators office list, the room is disorganised but one lime well
fitted out, not several things are strewn around by a large tantrum.
In though the bouble doors on the left your truly enters]
Hymirl: Sorry I'm late master, but I had some things to refer to, I
heard all is not to satisfaction?
Wykan [turning and branishing a sheet of paper]: NOT TO SATISFAION?
DRIVELLING FOOL. YOUR BABBLE IS LATE AS WELL A
POINTLESS! LOOK!
Hymirl: [reading speedly] 'makes much dollar' eh. Haven't seen any
of this before.
Wykan: OF COURSE NOT THATS THE FIRST BIT OF SPAM WE'VE EVER HAD.
AAAAAAAARGH!
Hymirl: No surely remember when rambie kept going on about.....
Wykan:[steely stare]
Hymirl:...but we let him off because we like him.
Wykan:[angry stare]
Hymirl: Lets just think nice calm thoughs, breathe in, breathe out,
nice calm.
Wykan: [muttering quietly]
Hymirl: nice, calm, calm, nice.
Wykan: [sighs] Right, I'm calm. Whats next. [remembers] Wait a
minute, what are you doing out of your cage?
Hymirl: Err. I can explain...no wait, I can't.
Wykan: right then...
Hymirl: LOOK AT THAT! [pointing over his shoulder]
Wykan: What, where. [Then collapses to the floor as hymirl smashes a
ming vase over his head]
hymirl: Aha, quiet at last. [leans out window, and produces
megaphone to address crowd below] EVERYTHING IS FINE,
CONTINUE ABOUT YOUR BUISNESS!
Crowd: WE WERE ANYWAY.
Hymirl turns back and finds himself facing Tim McElwain (wykan's evil
minion), and his guards.....
Tim: So what foul hersay are you up to now?
Guards:yeh.
Hymirl:Well I...
Tim: well I've heard enough, men set your crossbows to stun and fire
at will.
Guards: eh?
Tim:Fire.
Guards: right. At who?
[hymirl gone]
Tim: What noooooooooooo, he escapes again.
[Bat symbol does its. big then small again thing]
[meanwhile on Emperor Will's obiting cruiser]
[stepping off transporter pad] Hymirl: thanks will that was close.
[The high backed leather swings around and Emperor Will in his best
Emperor's hat froms his hands into the 'triangle of power'.]
Will: you seem to be mistaken, I'm not here to rescue you.....I want
that money you owe me.
Hymirl: what money?
Will: your ransom, you want to go home don't you? Bwahhahahaha!
Hymirl: oh. Uh, you know that you're about to be intercepted but a
squadron of McElwain's fighters?
Will: How would you know that?
Hymirl: because I can read that scanner plotter behing you.
Will [spins]: He doesn't want to allow my verminous money-grubbing on
this list, does he? Aargh. I should have researched
battleships, instead of coffe mixers.
Hymirl [sips coffee]: I don't know, this is good coffee.
Will: It should be, I spent 20,000 researching that. Anyhow I don't
have time for this pointless banter. To the bridge.
Will's 1st officier: You're on the bridge sire.
Will: Excellent. Battle stations.
At this point I leave it to you daer reader to turnt o your combat
simulators and see if indeed Will's general naughtyness will go
unpunished, or if the McElwain can restore order to the galaxy....or
at least this insignifical little part of it.
G'night folks.
Hymirl.
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