Big Muva
Surface of Ffion, a couple of miles from where Commander Niples is situated.
James smiled as he gazed over the alien terrain, bazookoid in his arms. It
was weird to think that a few hours ago he'd been at the Jupiter Mining
Corps Earth Recruitment Office, stepping into his stasis cubicle. Since then
he'd been on the bridge of a space ship, stolen a Blue Midget and attempted
to make board an alien space station. He'd made contact with an alien race
and now he was going to go into battle on an alien planet. Space was turning
out to be everything he'd expected of it. All he needed now was a green
woman.
The insects swarmed over the horizon, charging towards the trio of space
travellers. James, steadfast and determined, Doom, clutching his two
bazookoids with relish, not even bothering to wipe the foam from his mouth
and Efof, cautiously examining the weapon that had been thrust into his
hands, and staring forlornly at his former home.
"Now is our moment people," James said, trying to be inspirational, "Now we
will take on the forces of darkness, the odds may be stacked against us, but
we will win through, for Earth, for humanity, for the dead of Ffion, for
decency and democracy and the American way, for the forces of good, for
anti-communists everywhere, for mother, father and little baby joey, for all
the great space travellers throughout history, for apple pie, for... OW!" a
rock flying through the air concussed James and he collapsed to the ground,
unconcious.
Doom spat the saliva foaming round his mouth, laughed manically and charged
into the fray, screaming madly.
"SEEK REDEMPTION IN THE FLAMES OF DOOM YOU UNGODLY RETCHES OF THE GALAXY'S
UNDERGARMENTS!" Doom screached, "BEG FOR MERCY INFIDELS OF DIABLO! FLEE
PAWNS, BISHOPS AND HORSEYS OF THE DEVIL! GO TO HULL* WHORES OF SATAN'S
BROTHEL!"
He fired both bazookoids at once, managing to just about hit mid air. The
Bugs glared at him in terror and dived out of the way.
Efof struggled with his Bazookoid, and tenderly pushed a button at random.
There was an explosion and Efof was hurled backwards. He glanced round in
terror and attempted to fire the Bazookoid again, he shot twenty feet into
the air and landed in a crumpled heap in the centre of the battle. A bug
like the one on the space station rose above him, grinning in anticipation
of a good meal.
"Um," Efof mumbled fiddling with the Bazookoid.
The bug dived down and closed its jaws around Efof, before its head
exploded. Efof stood among the debris grinning, "That felt good!" he smiled,
"Man that felt GOOD!" He yelled with glee and fired again, and again,
decapacitating the bugs as they fled Doom.
Suddenly there was a loud buzzing in the air, and the sky went dark.
Efof stopped firing and gazed upwards.
On the other side of the battlefield Niples and his men had found James
nursing a head wound in a nearby crater.
One by one, they all looked up at the sky, it had something big in it.
Doom momentarily stopped his bombardment of near misses, and stared upwards,
"NOW IS THE END OF DAYS! I AM THE CHOSEN ONE! COME AND GET ME YOU BITCH!
COME AND GET ME!"
Niples gasped, "What the hell is that!" Niples wonderred.
"One big muvva," Harrison said shaking his head.
"These are insects right?" James said rubbing the mountainous bump that had
erupted on his head.
"Well, actually no, insects only have six legs while..." the doctor began.
"But they're similar. I mean, if these are like insects, doesn't it make
sense they might have a queen?"
"Either that or they go for blimps in a big way..." Harrison snarled.
* Not a typo
NRPG:
You know this is the most fun I've had on a sim in ages.
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