Coffey Goes Babysitting...

Rpg:
======================================================================
Who: Niples, Coffey, Trisees.
Where: Captain's Office.
When: Sometime after The Caty Roskev and Harris Chats.
======================================================================
Trisees wondered how long it would take before he died of boredom
in the medibay. He'd eventually been left alone to sit at
Shakespeare's desk, though he rather be moving around and actually
doing something science related. He'd never been good at relaxing.
Coffey, Chrysler and Wildflower had been tending to various light
injuries people had obtained, but the loss of his apparently once
existing medical knowledge and that their Chief Doctor, Kato or
something he wasn't sure what, was taking part in some stupid game
based on watching people live their lives. To Trisees, 'Bug Bother'
seemed to be a waste of time. What indeed was the point of watchign
peopel live their lives when you could quite easily watch ones own
family. And who really wanted to watch someone eating food, or
watching TV or even going to the lavatory. He failed to see the
appeal. But then, 95% of the ship seemed to be like this: A complete
waste of time.
He folded another of Shakespeare's files in half and tore it into
eigths before decorating the litter bin's edge with it.
"Hehe," he laughed quietly at the wreckage.
"Attention medical department, this is Captain Niples, I wish to
see Hazel Coffey and Larry Trisees in my office immediately," blared
a loud voice from the overhead speakers. Coffey looked up from her
guaze and over at Trisees who was smiling sweetly.
"Miss Nurse Woman," he said. "I believe the captain called for
us?"
Trisees was slightly excited. Not only was he going to be out and
about, but also he might be able to explain the whole sorry mess to
the one person that could believe his plight.
"10 micrograms of quartizine ought to do the trick, and easy on the
gauze matting," she told Chrysler. "I'll take care of Trisees."
Coffey walked alongside Trisees and they left the medibay.
"Feels good to get out of there," said Trisees, the first real sign
of a positive emotion showing on his face.
"Stop talking, and keep moving," said Coffey. She longed for
Shakespeare to return. She had never really disliked anyone before
as much as she now disliked Trisees.
The pair tapped gently on the Captain's door, and a clink of
glasses followed by a 'Please come in' met their ears; to which
Coffey and Trisees entered the plush ready room of Captain Niples.
"Ah, the enigmatic man makes his monumentous apperance," said
Niples, placing a glass of Riojca down on his desk.
"Am I the only one who thinks this is more than a little unfair? I
have the right to live my life as much as this Shakespeare
character. And let's face it I was here FIRST! He used MY body to
live, my appendages. I have more of a right to live this life!" he
shouted at Niples.
The captain was silent for a second.
"I presume you are the Scientist, Larry Trisees, that I've just
been hearing about?"
"Yes. I'm Larry," said Trisees, still fuming. "Not this
Shakespeare guy."
"I noticed," said Niples. "Tell me, Mr Trisees, what happened
after you left the building where you worked?"
"Like I told Copy here, I left the room, got into my waiting space
hopper, and then I was mugged by the driver. He hit me with a pipe,
and I blacked out. The next thing I know, it's twelve years later
and some renegade mind has been using my mind."
"You never said you were mugged," pointed out Coffey.
"I believe I was talking to Naples here," retorted
Trisees. "Anyway, Naples..."
"Ahem, I would prefer the term Captain while you are aboard my
ship, Mr Trisees," said Niples sternly.
"Anyway captain, I'm now stuck with a bunch of loony medical
officers on a ship that's reminiscent of a Monty Python sketch:
completely and utterly surreal and bizarre."
"And I'm sorry to have to tell you this Trisees, but until we
figure out a way to deal with the loss of Shakespeare and the gain of
you and your wonderful, charming personality, you will remain on said
Monty Python-esque ship until I say you are to leave."
"What?"
"You heard me Trisees. You are staying put on the Blue Dwarf. We
value our medical staff. It's not easy to come across doctors and
surgeons who are willing to give up a cushy job and lfie to work on a
deep space scow such as this one. Shakespeare was our best surgeon.
Admittedly he may have frightened a large amount of people with his
outrageous accent and personality, but you couldn't fault his
skills. We need him back to fix all the accidents that this crew
seems to enjoying getting themselves in. And until we work out a way
of bringing him back WITHOUT removing you from existence, you aren't
going anywhere."
"What am I supposed to do during this time? Grow a beard? Watch
the skutters painting the ship? Maybe write a couple of symphonies?
That should really pass my twilight years," said Trisees.
"We don't know if this process is temporary," explained Niples.
"whether it is or not, I for one, would like to know what's in
store for me while we wait for this 'better man' to return," he said
angrily.
"Well, I knwo for a fact that the medibay has just gained a new
nurse, which leaves Miss Coffey here, free to look after you until
some course of action is available. Mr Trisees, you will answer to
Miss Coffey for everything.
"She is essentially your 'babysitter.' You will do what she says,
when she says. And you will not question her. Is that understood?"
"You cannot be serious!" said Trisees.
"Is that understood?" repeated Niples.
"Yes. I got it the first time," said Trisees.
"Good. Is this okay with you Miss Coffey? I can give him to a
security detail if you'd prefer?"
"Give me? Am I some sort of present now?" muttered Trisees.
"No, it's okay sir, I'll look after Trisees. He needs a friendly
person. And seeing as Shakespeare and I were close, it's probably
best that I'm the one to keep him in check."
Trisees looked at Coffey, slighlty stunned. He hadn't expected
that.
"This okay with you, Mr. Trisees?" asked Niples.
"Yes sir."
"Good. Now, I need to speak to some more individuals. You would
not believe how taxing it is to return to the ship and find a pile of
paperwork as high as your ceiling," laughed Niples, taking another
sip of Riojca.
"Yes, I can see that with all the boozing," muttered Trisees.
Coffey and Trisees entered the medibay a mere ten mintues later.
"So, Coffey, what now?" he asked, a look of total boredom plastered
over his features.
Coffey looked at Trisees with disdain. "First of all, I need to do
something that will make talking and working with you a lot easier,"
she said, pulling out a pair of scissors.
Trisees' experession changed to one of worry and he backed away
gently.
"I hope cutting out my tongue isn't what you meant," he said.
"No, something a little more aesthetic," she said.
Sometime later Trisees looked in the mirror once more and shuddered
violently.
"What have you done to me?!" he asked for the umpteenth time.
"What's up? It looks good."
"It looks homosexual," he moaned. Trisees hair was now almost skin
head short and coloured blonde and orange.
"It looks different to how Shakespeare had it, and that's the
point," she said. "Now get a centrifuge and five test tubes. I want
to examine your blood, see if there's a virus in there, or something."
Trisees muttered and unhappily ambled over to one of the shelving
cabinets. He glanced up to see a large centrifuge and next to it a
massive jar filled with a purply coloured liquid.
He stood on a chair and reached for the centirifuge, looking at the
same time at the jar.
"Coffey, why does this Kato guy have a head in a jar?" he asked.
"I don't know," said Coffey, shivering to think of the head. "But
if you don't hurry up and bring the equipment, I'll replace it with
yours."
Trisees mumbled again. "Got to be PMT or the like," he said.
======================================================================