Eight

Artemis was living out two of his fears. Lars Lindstrom being in a position of power, and eating food cooked by things that he (Artemis) had created, namely the prototype Chef GELF that Artemis and an old colleague had thrown together to justify their funding after a month of blowing government funds on illegal cloning experiments. The Missus would be proud of him though, he was behaving himself with only the minimum required alcohol.

Gums passed by Alex, Artemis, and Herbie, a tray of drinks in hand. Alex took a pair of radioactive cocktails, Herbie took some sort of strange martini, and Artemis took two glasses of moonshine. Gums started to continue his rounds, Artemis grabbed his arm. "Not done" he said, grabbing two more glasses. "You are dismissed" he said.

Artemis threw down the first glass, and looked around the table. The others looked just as wary and miserable as he did. Artemis then looked to the ice sculpture of Blue Dwarf, and died a little inside.

Gums passed by again, setting glasses down at the spots where Lindstrom, Alexis, and "The Sheriff" (a lobotomized simulant that acted as the Liason between the prison and the Space Corps, which at this point in time must have still existed).

Artemis grabbed Lindstrom's glass and went to work serrating the edges with a steak knife. He kept it out of view of the cameras and made sure not to put it near his pockets (the biometric scanners would notice the weapon heading towards a pocket and activate the collar). Artemis looked across the table at Frank and nodded. Frank nodded back, understanding what Artemis was trying to tell him.

Artemis looked at the glass, the edges were now sharp, sharp enough to hopefully draw blood.

He put the glass back and went back to drinking and feeling sorry for himself.

"I hope I didn't keep you waiting too long. I wanted to ensure that we wouldn't be disturbed" Lindstrom announced as he, his wife, and the odd simulant entered the room, taking their places at the table.

"It is nice to see you all, Artie never told me anything so I took it upon myself to keep an eye on you all in the hopes that we would all meet some day" Lindstrom's eyes landed on Plisken. "Especially those of you who I take an...interest in" He then looked to Artemis, who was shotgunning another glass of moonshine.

"Now, I take it that the meals were up to spec?" he said.

The Dwarfers nodded and muttered their replies.

"Let's get this next course underway, shall we?" Alexis added, smiling at her father, who gave her a belch and a dead stare in return.

The GELF and Mechanoid butlers served the Dwarfers a series of odd looking animals and vegetables, likely captured from dozens of different dimensions.

Lindstrom and The Sheriff carried on conversations with the other Dwarfers, meanwhile, Alexis ate and kept trying to have a conversation with her dear Father, Artemis.

"So, Artemis is a pretty name" she said. "....and a girl's name"
"I was named after my distant grandmother, and legendary super-scientist, Dr. Artemis K. Pritchard, if you don't know who she is you've shamed your family" Artemis snarled.
"Uh...I know it's a tradition that the first born is always given the name Artemis Kathryn Pritchard" Alexis chirped

The Dwarfers looked up.

"I thought you said your middle name was Karl?" Jamie said with a grin on his face.

"Well, it's not, it's Kathryn. Big whoop" Artemis said, shotgunning another drink and grabbing two more from Gums as he passed. Gums deposited a third next to Artemis' stockpile and whispered "you'll want more for when the master opens his mouth"

Alexis shifted uncomfortably in her chair. "So...uh...I was talking with my friends the other day and we were saying how their parents..."
"If I cared about what you and your friends talked about I'd stick a pulse rifle in my mouth and pull the trigger with my toes" Artemis growled. "Pass, next topic" he added.

Alexis was determined to have a decent conversation with her father, for once.

"So daddy, how is mommy?" she said.
"The machine that mixed my saliva with your DNA?" Artemis blurted, suddenly realizing Alexis was referring to The Missus, not M0M-3 the mixing machine.
"Oh, The Missus, yes, she has no idea that you exist or that you're biologically related to me and that technically we already have a child, otherwise she'd be dying to meet you" Artemis said, the alcohol interfering with his ability to shut up.
"Really?"
"Yes, she wants kids but my ability to deliver them is hindered by my hatred for in-vitro and the fact that I'm human and she's a Science Skutter"
"But I thought you already had kids?"
"What made you think that?'
"I met them"

Artemis blew moonshine out of his nose. "What?!"
"Yes, I went forward in time and met them. Mommy was taking all eight of them to school on the Blue Dwarf Promenade"
"I'll have you know that I don't take kindly to playing with a sensitive subject like that! The Missus is already upset as it is and I won't have you toying with her emotions and my patience like that!" Artemis yelled.
"Alexis does not lie, sir" Gums interjected. "I was with her, we traveled to a point in the future after you've served your sentence to find that you and your wife had children. I don't know how, or how many years into the future it is, but yes, you do have children"

Artemis pushed the moonshine away and looked at Alexis. "What did they look like?"
"They were adorable! They were all little Skutlings, all kinds of different colors and sizes, one of them was even named Artemis K. Pritchard VII"
Artemis smiled. "Huh....what do you know. After I've served my sentence you say?"
Alexis nodded.

Artemis took a sip of water "...or after I've escaped..." he said under his breath.

"Well, congratulations on your fatherhood, however many thousands of years in the future it may be" Lindstrom said, holding up his glass for Gums to fill.

The ape-GELF sighed and filled the glass with red wine. He noticed the serrated edge but didn't say anything.

Lindstrom went to take a sip, the serrated edge went right into his lower lip and cut him. Lindstrom coughed, tossed the cup away, and covered his lip. "GUMS! I AM WOUNDED!"

Artemis and Alexis rushed to Lindstrom's aid, Frank did as well, but collected the broken shards of the cup with the blood first, wrapping them in napkins and putting them in his pockets. Frank winked at Artemis and then sat back down.

Gums took Lindstrom aside to treat the wound and regenerate the broken skin. After he returned, the evening resumed.

Artemis chatted with his GELF "daughter" and started to lighten up a little.

<tag>

What else happens? Does Lindstrom and/or Alexis and/or Gums spoil anything else about anyone else's future? Remember that because they're tailing us at random points in time they don't know how far into the future it is and can't give many specific details.
The blood collection was for the escape plan, I'll show you how that works into it later. Does anyone have any suggestions for how we can all meet after the dinner to discuss our escape? Maybe we meet on a transport back to the cell blocks or we all sneak off and meet somewhere
What is "The Sheriff" like? Is he a nice guy or a jerk? What kind of personality is he programmed with? Is he a southern gentleman or a colonist beatnik? What does he know about you? Or is he just here as decoration?
Anything else happen at the dinner?