Kill Phil part one.

Who:- Jay, entire crew
Where:- Mollopod prisons and surrounding areas
When:- during the breakout.
"CHRIS!" shouted Jay over the commotion as the giant spider led the way down the
corridor toward the exit, "I want Mollopod casualties kept to a minimum!
Incapacitate them by non-lethal means where possible. We're not waging a war
here, we just need to escape back to the Blue Dwarf!"
"Not gonna be easy captain!" Harris replied, ducking as a Mollopod teleported in
next to him, swung for him, then teleported out again. "They're not going to go
down without a fight!"
"I know!" Jay said, tossing back a `marination grenade' that had landed at his
feet to the Mollopod that had thrown it, splattering the slug and his comrades
with tikka sauce. "But we need to maintain the alliance! High Command have made
that VERY clear, we cannot afford an all out war with these people!"
"To be fair..they started it!"
"What are you? Eight?" Jay asked "But technically, they thing WE started it.
Until we can get back to the ship and find a way to convince them that we aren't
working with the Hymenoptera, we've gotta expect hostility!"
A mollopod was hurled over their heads by Rosette.
"And to be honest, THAT'S not gonna help!"
Chris shrugged, but signalled that he understood, he placed his fingers on the
earpiece he was wearing and spoke, issuing a command to his teams – "All units,
use non-lethal force where possible! Minimise mollopod casualties, Captains
orders!"
"Chris" Jay said "One more thing…"
"What?"
"Where the hell is Phil?"
Who:- Phil
Where:- Elsewhere in the Prison complex
Phil was not the most normal of people, this was clear. Here was a man who was
worshipped by aliens from the future, was stuck in a continuous ten-year time
loop, gained super-human powers on a Thursday and believed himself to be Lucifer
(Louie to his friends) when drunk. Today, being a Tuesday was meant to be as
normal a day as Phil could be expected to have but here he was alone in the
depth of an alien slug's prison, wearing only his combat boots, and a bikini
thong, and a pair of nipple tassels.
He'd been separated from the rest of the crew by accident. He'd gotten into a
scuffle with a Mollopod guard who's teleporter gun had accidentally gone off
sending Phil to the other end of the Prison complex. Sadly, his clothes had for
some reason, not teleported with him. Unfortunately for Phil, who had done the
sensible thing and immediately attempted to find some replacement clothes to
hide his modesty, the only other human in this area was a stripper from the
Strip Club that had replaced Seymours Restaurant after Phil changed the Blue
Dwarf's blueprints on his recent time travel expedition. (The club was
originally named Peppermint Rhino, but Jay and Phil felt a bit guilty about
destroying Seymours business so transferred the deeds into his name and renamed
the club "Seymour's Nipples" Seymour was currently unaware of this as he had not
been on the ship since…anyway I digress..
The stripper was dead, so Phil took no delight in removing her clothes, but
remove them he did. He wandered aimlessly around the prison complex for a while,
checking the odd room here or there for weapons, or any equipment he could use.
What he eventually found was a storeroom full of equipment that had been
transported down from the Blue Dwarf by Mollopod salvage teams. There was Phils
own motorcycle, the Tomahawk, Jay's Chevrolet Corvette, that he'd bought in
1984…on Phils credit card. Several deactivated Pee-wees and Skutters littered
the room, but one thing caught Phil's eye. Something that only two people had
ever had direct access to. Something that towered above everything else in the
room. Something that had been built by Chris Zodar, and piloted on several
occasions by Jay. Something Phil was finally going to get his mitts on.
Phil rubbed his hands together gleefully as he walked toward the EVE-1
battlesuit.
<to be continued>

< Prev : RE: [JMC_Blue_Dwarf] Seymour - \"Queen problems\" Next > : Kill Phil - Part one