Niples - "Babies are annoying"

OOC – Apologies for last time calling Reuben's character mk9, he is
now Mk10!
<snip>
"Okay Seymour I'm fully charged again. But what do I do with this? It
won't stop crying."
Mk9 handed him a baby.
Baby Alota, Seymour's child with Jenny Bond. The baby cried as he
held it outstretched in his arms, not sure what to do with it. It
stopped crying long enough to puke in his face.
<end snip>
Who: Seymour Niples and Mk10
When: After Seymour gets the baby
Where: Promenade
The baby stopped being sick, then started, then stopped again.
Seymour wanted to launch the thing as far away from himself as
possible, but he has always been paranoid about his throwing since
primary school when the other kids teased him for throwing like a
girl. Also it was a living breathing thing. A living breathing thing
that was his own daughter.
It had not yet sunk in that Seymour was a dad. He didn't feel like a
dad. He barely even saw the kid, and had been angry at jenny for
never letting him spend time with baby Alota. Now he held her at arms
length and wondered what he was supposed to do now.
She burped and the last blob of sick dribbled from her mouth down a
saturated bib and splashed to his expensive right shoe, where he was
already stood in a pool of baby sick.
"That was my best suit! Do you know who I am?" He complained at the
baby. Although it was a ridiculous outburst as the baby had no idea
who he was.
It was the most revolting thing ever. Seymour felt like he needed a
shower just touching the baby (and he was covered in sick). Luckily
in case he didn't know how revolting it was. Mk10 told him so.
"Human babies are revolting!" said the robot. "I'm glad I was just
assembled. Can't you just assemble a human to be fully grown and not
as .... gross?" he said.
Seymour agreed. But before he could say anything another person came
over. It was the Area Manager for the Promenade shopping area.
"Can you take that baby somewhere else?" he said sternly. "And clean
up all this mess. Can't you see the mess it's making?"
"Yes of course I can you imbecile. I'm wearing most of it. And I am
NOT cleaning it up, don't you know who I am? I'm the Royal Ambassador
to the Queen. The QUEEN! So I'm not cleaning anything up. That's YOUR
job."
"No it isn't." said the man.
"Yes it is you lowly scumbag. You're in the service industry."
The man handed Seymour a mop.
"And what do you want me to do with that. Royal Ambassadors DON'T
clean. I'm so posh I don't even know what that is."
"It's a mop." said Mk10 helpfully.
"I know that. Don't you side with him!" Seymour said. Pointing an
accusing finger at Mk10 whilst tucking the baby under his arm. Mk10
kicked the floor with his foot.
"Look all I'm asking is for you to clean up this mess and leave."
Said the Manager.
Seymour turned his nose up and spun around. "I will do the latter.
This place is rubbish anyway. Mk10 will clean it up."
Seymour walked off leaving the Promenade's Manager staring at Mk10
expectantly. Mk10 shrugged at him and walked off, following Seymour.
"So where are we going?" the short robot asked.
"To the Medibay. I'm going to see if Jenny is awake yet so I can give
back this loathsome infant." He carried the baby under his arm, it
gurgling all the way.
------Medibay---------
The medibay was busy with people being treated for wounds from
fighting the gelfs. Seymour saw Jenny laying on a bed. She didn't
look so good. Seymour quickly sneaked up and plonked the baby on the
bed next to her and sneaked off again.
"Are you going to just leave her like that?" Mk10 said.
"I jolly well hope so!" said Seymour, but as he turned to escape from
the medibay, Tara Cleavage stood in his way with her fists on her
hips.
"Oh... erm... good day Mrs Febuggure." he said, bowing slightly to
her and trying to get past.
"Not so fast. Jenny is in a serious condition."
Seymour straightened up. "Oh?"
Tara walked over to Jenny's bed. Where the baby was trying to crawl
around. "Jenny has got a severe concussion. She might be in a coma
for a long time. So as the child's father you'll have to look after
the baby."
A look of panic appeared on Seymour's face. "How long?!" he asked,
thinking only of the disruption to his own life rather than the
baby's.
"We don't know. It could be days, it could be weeks." Tara handed him
the baby. Seymour almost resisted, but took her reluctantly.
"But... this is an outrage. I can't look after a baby, imagine the
disruption to my own life? Think of the mess... the inconvenience..."
"But you're her father. She needs some fatherly compassion and
parenting." said Tara. Behind him Mk10 sniggered.
"Parenting?" I don't even know how!"
"You'll learn." said Tara.
"But... what about compassion. How do I learn that?" he said panic
stricken. "Can't i just leave it here?"
"No!"
"Will you change her nappy for me?"
"No!"
"Will you teach me?"
"Look I'm very busy with treating dying people. Go and read a book or
something." Tara turned and walked away.
Seymour looked at Mk10. "What do I do? I can't even get a nanny
robot, all the scutters have been destroyed."
"It can't be that hard to do it yourself." said Mk10 without thinking
what he was saying.
"Do you know how?"
"No.... but..." Mk10 stopped speaking suddenly.
"What? What were you going to say. YOU can do it? Yes. You can look
after the baby!"
"No. I don't know how."
"But you can just tilt your hear and say 'accessing' and access the
correct information in your memorybanks?"
"No Seymour. I'm not Data from Star Trek. I don't have the entire of
wikipedia in my head."
"You're rubbish. Why did I buy you?"
"You didn't! I'm part of the crew."
Seymour didn't know what to say so settled for "Good!" and walked off
with the baby. Then after a few moments of Mk10 trying to figure out
what had transpired. Seymour quickly ran back and placed baby Alota
in his robotic arms. "Just look after her for a short while, I've got
an important meeting with... dignitaries and... heads of state.. and
things. Very important and very prestigious. Toodaloo!"
"Hey wait!" the robot protested. But Seymour had quickly ducked into
an Expresslift and was gone.
<Tag Reuben if you're feeling better>