Characters in this post
View character profile for: Joey Donner NPC
View character profile for: Charlie Tweeder NPC
View character profile for: Leonard Hofstadter NPC
View character profile for: Nikki Nix Smith-Jones
Let me offer you some advice.
Meanwhile Joey and Charlie somehow managed to remove the hot sauce from their backs in time and were left with red marks on their backs from the chemical burns. However being the macho men that they were they acted like it was just a simple matter. In reality it felt like a sunburn at this stage. So once they left the showers they had planned to get back at Jack for his cruel trick, but sadly they knew they could not fight him since he one beat them quickly with little effort the last time. So as the two idiots racked their brains they saw another cute rocker girl nearby and forgot all about Jack. They then made their way to her and promptly began hitting on Nix.
Joey: Well hello sexy. You look so familiar. Didn't we take a class together? I could've sworn we had chemistry.
Charlie: I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours?
Nix heard the two's rapid fire pickup lines. Like they'd practiced in the mirror this morning. Running her fingers through her hair making sure it was all flopped the right way.
Nix: Well aren't the two of you bold.
She let out a small laugh. Nix put a hand on her hip and leaned slightly.
Nix: Go on. Try some more, see what other bangers you've Googled.
Joey and Charlie were a bit shocked that Nix seemed interested in their cheesy pickup lines. They nodded at each other before they spoke up. They seemed eager to impress her so they whipped out their best pickup lines to impress her.
Joey: Well ask and ye shall receive my tall drink of water. I hope you know CPR, because you just took my breath away!
Charlie wasted no time following Joey’s lead.
Charlie: So, aside from taking my breath away, what do you do for a living?
Joey: I ought to complain to Spotify for you not being named this week’s hottest single.
Charlie: Are you a parking ticket? ‘Cause you’ve got ‘fine’ written all over you.
Joey: Your eyes are like the ocean; I could swim in them all day.
Charlie: When I look in your eyes, I see a very kind soul.
Joey: If you were a vegetable, you’d be a ‘cute-cumber.’
Charlie: Do you happen to have a Band-Aid? ‘Cause I scraped my knees falling for you.
Joey: I never believed in love at first sight, but that was before I saw you.
Charlie: I didn’t know what I wanted in a woman until I saw you.
Both boys were still using body gestures to enhance their pickup lines as they gave her a smoldering smile.
Joey: I was wondering if you could tell me: If you’re here, who’s running Heaven?
Charlie: No wonder the sky is gray (or dark, if at night)—all the color is in your eyes.
Joey: You’ve got everything I’ve been searching for, and believe me—I’ve been looking a long time.
Charlie: You’re like a fine wine. The more of you I drink in, the better I feel.
Joey: You’ve got a lot of beautiful curves, but your smile is absolutely my favorite.
Charlie: Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?
Joey: If being sexy was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged.
Charlie: I was wondering if you’re an artist because you were so good at drawing me in.
Joey: It says in the Bible to only think about what’s pure and lovely… So I’ve been thinking about you all day long girl cuz you so fine.
Charlie: Do you have a map? I just got lost in your eyes.
Both boys seemed confidant in their act and were hoping for a reward for rising to the occasion for Nix even though they didn’t know her name.
Nix cocked an eyebrow and gave a lopsided smirk. Looking at them pursing her lips.
Nix: I'll be honest. A few of those were good. But, might I offer some advice?
Nix didn't wait for a response.
Nix: Smooth.
She pointed at Joey.
Nix: The Spotify one was actually good. For real, never heard it before. But the curves one, maybe save it for someone more curvy.
She pointed at Charlie
Nix: Cowboy, you need to focus on your accent. The Yee-Haw things got potential use it.
Now normally when Joey hits on a girl he usually pays attention to her body shape, eye color, age, interests, voice and weaknesses. However he was being influenced by Charlie and he was distracted by the hot sauce on his back so he failed to notice that Nix had an accent similar to Dante which sounded a bit midwestern/southern and slightly deeper as well. So it was obvious Joey was not flirting with his “A” game at this point and poor Charlie as usual was trying way too hard.
Joey and Charlie had very confused expressions on their faces now. They just used all their best pickup lines on this girl and now she was critiquing them like a teacher. They stared at Nix for a moment then looked at each other with the same confused expression. The two stared at each other as if they didn’t know what to say next. They felt as if they were being judged and insulted at the same time. Of course this was why they avoided smart girls since they used words they didn’t understand. Joey was a low level teen model with a big ego and Charlie was a wannabe cowboy living a lie. Then after a moment of internal conflict the two boys looked at Nix again with an uneasy expression. Their expression was ironically similar to one a person would have when the pizza delivery person arrives at the door, drops the pizza on the floor then puts it back in the box and serves it to the customer as if nothing happened and still expecting a tip. Joey then shook his head a bit to snap out of his shock and spoke up.
Joey: Wait are you flirting back or just mocking us?
Charlie: What is mocking?
Nix's brow furrowed and a pout cross her lips. Looking hurt by them saying she was making fun of them, she genuinely was. (She wasn't...)
Nix: I was just trying to help. And you're acting like I'm trying to hurt you.
Nix kept looking hurt. She looked at both of them.
Nix: You're not trying to hurt me are you. Because you were doing so good, you made me laugh, and I was gonna help you get in a girls head so you could flirt better, but now I think you are just mean. You're not mean are you?"
Joey: Its……..
Joey was about to answer Charlie’s question when Nix spoke up. Her response through his mind for a loop as he now questioned if she was weird or dumb. Seeing as she had green hair he figured she leaned towards the weird side for than the dumb side but maybe she was both? Naturally he had managed to date a lot of bimbos with low self-esteem in his time and it was true he did live a good challenge now and then just to prove he was a man, but this girl was confusing him now. Charlie on the other hand seemed genially upset by Nix now since she made him feel dumb…….., well dumber than usual as it was.
Joey: Mean? Us? Come on girl we are a nice as nice can be. After all we gave you a chance to get cozy with us and in return you dish out the venom and call us mean.
Charlie: yeah what he said.
Joey: Girl you got no idea who I am do you?
Charlie: That’s right girly.
Joey strut his muscles and smolder expression before he spoke up.
Joey: As you can see you are looking at a real model who has graced the covers of many magazines and ads. Not only do I have looks, but I have money and charm. You are looking at the total package here.
Charlie: Yeah and you blew it ya stupid girl. Hahahaa. Maybe if you apologize and make with the free service you might get forgiven. Right Joey?
Joey: Oh yeah so make with the apology and start with the service girl.
Joey and Charlie seemed very confident in their words as if they were gods looking down on the masses below them.
Nix's let out a small chortle before her face went very serious as she placed a hand on each ones shoulder, at first the touch was somewhat near flirtatious, but her thumb and pointer finger quickly found purchase on the nerves of the neck muscle. Gripping surprisingly hard. Nix began to speak slowly so they could understand.
Nix: Let me be clear about ONE thing. I'll use words a child could understand. If you ever speak to me that way again...I'll rip off those sorry excuses for dicks you want to swing around, and YOU will be the ones people call girly. GET ME!?
With the last word she squeezed harder to show she was both not messing around and that she was strong enough to not take their shit, and with that she gave them a shove back, letting go and nearly causing them to trip over each other.
Nix: And if I hear about you harassing more of the girls I'll teach you what your balls taste like.
And with that she walked away towards the food truck.
Both Joey and Charlie were in shock by Nix’s words as they looked up at Nix from the sandy ground. At first they were confused by her, then upset and now they scared by her words. They were now feeling a barrage of mixed feelings. Joey was aroused, scared, confused and suddenly craving a snack. It was scary that he was imagining himself as Nix’s pet and she walked him down the beach on a leash in his mind. The scary part was they he was in favor of the idea. Charlie on the other hand was also feeling a barrage of mixed emotions such as fear, confusion, hunger and the image of Justin Bieber gyrating before him for a dollar. He was of course afraid to admit this in public since he was determined to maintain his image as a fake cowboy jock that was popular with the ladies. Of course what Nix saw on their face was the look of two deer looking at some bright headlights heading their way. As they watched her leave they failed to notice the two soccer balls flying at their heads. After a very hard impact they passed out on the sand and lay there silently as the two young girls retrieved their soccer balls.
Then Leonard Hofstadter who was a 3rd year unpopular nerd happened to see Joey and Charlie get tripped by Nix and then got hit by the two soccer balls. So out of curiosity he quickly made his way to them to check on them and saw them out cold. So he looked around to see if anyone was coming and when they were not he made a wicked smile and pulled out a small bottle of sun block lotion and proceeded to pour it on the chests of Joey and Charlie. After he was done he put the bottle in his pocket and casually walked away. He snickered as he imagined when they would realize someone wrote some naughty words on their chests to burn in by the sun. On Charlie’s chest was the word “PANSY” and on Joey’s chest was the word “WUSS” in sunblock cream. Leonard then made his way to the snack truck to enjoy a victory dessert.
(Copost with myself and Jaxx)