RE: [JMC_Blue_Dwarf] *Action* \"This existance gets worse\"

"And look at this report you wrote…" said his head of security. "The spelling is atrocious!"
*applauds*
 
Mr Jones wpould be proud.....wait no... i meant offended, thats the one!

-----Original Message-----From: Onion [mailto:theonion770@...]Sent: 17 February 2005 08:05To: JMC_Blue_Dwarf@yahoogroups.comSubject: [JMC_Blue_Dwarf] *Action* "This existance gets worse"The JMC Green DwarfEdge of the Solar SystemAlternate timelineThe Captain of the Green Dwarf sat edgily in his office. They had been out of spacedock less than a week and already he was anxious about the job, it was a deep space exploration mission – and he was bored already."Maybe its time for a change" he said, getting up off the chair, ready to ring JMC command when there was a knock at his door. The door opened and three officers walked in. He smiled, and urged them to sit – but they remained stood, all with arms folded. Stern looks on their faces."Captain…. We're not happy with your command." Started one."We don't feel you're dedicated enough for this crew." Said another."And your command decisions are terrible!" said the other. The Captain looked shocked. "But we've only been on this mission a day, and you've come up with these decisions already?""Well, yes!" Said his first officer. "Your first decision was to take the ship dangerously close to the first gaseous anomaly you found." "That's our mission… explore space artefacts…. Including dangerous gaseous anomalies…""Yes but sir, that was the SUN!""Ah yes…" "Listen sir, this isn't going to work. The crew have absolutely no respect for you because you have no respect for them.""In fact we all can't stand you." Said the chief engineer."And look at this report you wrote…" said his head of security. "The spelling is atrocious!""Well I don't know what to say…" said the Captain of the Green Dwarf."Don't say anything." Said the security chief, pulling a laser pistol on him. "This is a mutiny, you're going to the brig!"Suddenly, the lights dimmed and an alert siren sounded. "Whats that?!" asked the Captain. "It's the red alert siren you fool!""Oh yes."They all rushed into the Drive room. "There's three massive ships just been detected!" Said the sensor operator. They looked out of the window, to see the ships heading straight for them."What do we do, what do we do?! Panic, Panic!" Yelled the Captain running around like a fool.The first officer sighed and shot him in the back on low stun setting. He fell to the floor in pain."Are they a known species?" Asked the first officer."No… they're like no design on record. They almost look like giant insects. Hold on sir, the ships are going straight past us" said the sensor operator. "It looks like we're not much of a threat!""Where are they heading?" Asked the first officer."Earth sir."The Captain got up off the floor. "Earth? Earth! We must stop them!"  he said. "Fire all weapons!!!"The sensor operator looked at him blankly. "Are you sure?""No don't!" Said the first officer. But it was too late, the slightly insane Captain pressed down hard on the firing controls. A measly pulse of energy emerged from the Green Dwarf's laser turret and struck the last massive ship on the back as it went past, doing no damage."Fool!" Shouted the First officer to the Captain, and shot him again. Again he stumbled to the floor.The large ships firstly seemed not to notice, then a large swarm of ships started to spew out of the large one. Like a plague of insects, the ships surrounded the Green Dwarf, pelting it with weapon shots of corrosive thick matter. The hull plating started to burn away and crack. The Green Dwarf gradually melted, until the engine drive plates corroded from the gooey acidic matter, causing the ship to explode in a violent blast.The Green Dwarf was no more. The Hymenoptera ships continued heading towards Earth…...Protecting the universe from the scum of the Earth...www.BlueDwarf.co.uk