Major Harris 'Going with a bang'

Blue Dwarf
Some corridor near the promenade
"Jackson!" Harris yelled over the ship's internal com as he loaded a rocket launcher, which had been modified for use in a paintball match that he had Lloyd dig out of storage, with ointment. There was no way he was to use a nambie-pamnie child's watergun.
"Yes, Major Harris sir?" Jackson's voice replied over the internal com.
"Have you found that screwball captain yet?!" Harris demanded.
"Not yet." Was replied with a nervous tone.
"Find him Jackson or I'll bust you down to sergeant so quickly you never know what hit you!" Harris snarled.
"Yes, Major." With that the com link was broken.
Harris then linked into the entire ship's internal com and then ordered. "All security personnel, not you Jackson, report to the promenade immediately!"
Harris then silently counted up to five in his head and then he bellowed over the com. "I mean NOW!"
Throughout the ship the rumbling of security officers making a dash towards the promenade echoed throughout the corridors.
Couple of hours later
Promenade
Harris and Lloyd primed their rocket launchers. The two were stood on the upper floor look and below on the floor below was almost the entire security department save for those that have been killed, strangely disappeared and of cause Jackson.
Harris signalled Lloyd and then the two aimed towards each other and after a moment, they fired. The two ointment filled rockets flew from the launchers and struck each other as they were halfway across the promenade. A snowstorm of ointment began to fall upon the security officers below and throughout the ship the hallucinations of the security staff vanished.
Harris leaned on the rail looking down at the cured security staff, now all he had to do was to arm this lot with ointment filled weaponry. Just hope there's enough ointment, Harris throught to himself. Lloyd was merely thinking, thank god the MacDonalds hadn't been blown up. This however wasn't to be as the rocket launcher slipped from her hand and dropped to the floor, a rocket was launcher and it flew through the air and in the worse luck, flew through the MacDonalds window and was followed by a explosion and a sheet of green ointment covered everything.
"Ah shit!" Lloyd commented.