Condimentary

<Snip>
"You're remarkably amusing, Mr Chrysler. Just not in the way you
intend. I think this is the one," announced Keto, turning around
and
holding up the container filled with a yellow-ish liquid, "I'm
reasonably certain that this is the ointment used on you...which I'm
assuming is the cause of all this."
"Reasonably certain!?" exclaimed Jack, staring at it, "And what if
it ISN'T?"
"Then none of us will live long enough to find out, will we?"
<End Snip>
"That's not the ointment" Tara said
"Cleavage don't question me"
"Xavier, That's NOT the ointment"
Jack decapitated one of his clones at this point, and threw it's
sword to Jay, who caught it, dropped it, picked it up, swung it
around so it was pointing upwards and sliced a large gash all along
the ceiling.
"Chrysler do you mind?!" Keto said, annoyed "By all means
disassemble your own department but I prefer mine intact!"
"THAT'S NOT THE SMEGGING OINTMENT DOCTOR KETO!!!"
Keto sighed, and put down the swab and the plate he was holding, on
which he was smearing the ointment to place under a microscope, he
pinched the bridge of his nose with his left hand and slammed his
right onto the workbench, squeezing the edge of it viciously.
"Cleavage…I KNOW I'm going to regret this but WHAT THE HELL MAKES
YOU SO UTTERLY SURE THAT YOU'D RISK QUESTIONING ME ON MEDICAL
MATTERS??!"
"Because the ointment I used on Jay was purple"
"It's always about the sodding colour with you women isn't it?!"
Tara chose to ignore that "As well as the fact…" she said, in a
venomous tone "That what you are currently examining under the
microscope is MUSTARD!"
Keto picked up the jar in which the `ointment' had been
contained. "How can you tell?!"
Tara grabbed the jar and twisted it so the that label was now
visible to the Doctor. "Tesco's value range English mustard"
"SEE!" Tara said "And you're so bloody tight you wouldn't even
stretch to a decent mustard either!"
"Look you think I'm going to waste all that money on the stuff when
the I only thing I use mustard for is to smear on Doctor Cerebrums
eyes when its time for his annual eye test, really burns you know!"
Keto said, going off on a tangent ".but then he went and died and
ruined all my fun…the selfish fool…" he muttered.
"Whatever Doc" said Jay "Just find the smegging ointment and MAKE A
COUNTER-AGENT BEFORE WE ALL GET SLAUGHTERED!"
<taggers people!>