Re: [JMC_Blue_Dwarf] Re: **ACTION** Deano goes Down

I wholehearedly, and completely accept that the error was....all his fault! :) No, to be serioud for a minute, we both cocked it up. Whoops. Sorry. :)
 
Chris

----- Original Message -----
From: Onion
To: JMC_Blue_Dwarf@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Saturday, August 30, 2003 2:10 PM
Subject: [JMC_Blue_Dwarf] Re: **ACTION** Deano goes Down
Sorry my fault everyone!!! Dean asked me where Whitewolf was and I forgot he was still dead, I read the post over but stupidly it didnt occur in my mind to mention it!So just replace Whitewolf with Alotta in the action. And in case anyone is really that nitpicky- i've rewritten the action with alotta instead of the dead hamster!***Action***Dean had been talking in the bar to the new crew intake, when he had startedto scratch his head."Damn" he said to Johnny, "My head really..." <thud>Well, Johnny B Good, the latest addition to the crew, didn't quite know whatto do when 2nd in command's of departments starting passing out on thefloor. Of course, those who knew Dean well would just have kicked him, and,if that didn't work, whispered "sober" in his ear.As it stood. John called the medibay and asked for an ambulance. The Medibaypromptly guffawed and said "What you think this is? The smegging Ritz?""He's 6'10 for smeg's sake!" replied Johnny, "How am I meant to carry him toMedibay?"<click-buzz>" was the reply, as medibay hung up on him.<MEANWHILE - ON EARTH, IN PLANETARY GOVERNMENT INTELLIGENCE, A DISCOVERY ISBEING MADE...>"Sir?" said a subordinate to a superior."What?" he snapped back, spraying doughnut crumbs over the vicinity."You know our escaped prisoner? Colonel Mayhem?""The one that escpaed last year and is currently subject to a massivemanhunt? Well, womanhunt in this case.""Yes. That's her. We've found her.""WHERE?" The superior leapt up, knocking his box of doughnuts to the floorand picking up the telephone."A space vessel sir. The JMC Blue Dwarf. A filthy mining ship full of moronsand space-core rejects. But it has a good lapdancing club in the seedy endof the promenade.... erm... so i've been told""Arrange an arrest squad. Several divisions strong, she's dangerous andneeds to be apprehended. Come on! MOVE MOVE MOVE!"The subordinate skittered out and started organising an arrest squad.It lifted off barely 40 minutes later. The best that Earth had to offer.<BACK ON THE DWARF>Johnny staggered into the medibay, carrying Dean's comatose form and dumpingit on a bed. "Hello?""Now what?" said Keto, irritably, coming out of his office where he hadbeen planning an empire made entirely out of soft cheese. Not for anyreason, just it was better then the real paperwork he had to do."Dean's, umm..""So what? Do what we usually do?""What's that?""Put him on the floor please." said Keto, pulling on a rubber glove."What's the for?" said Johnny, placing Dean on the floor."It makes it look better when I do <THUD!> that." said Keto, savagelykicking Dean in the ribs."Smeg. This might be serious dammit. Ok, I'll do a quick examination." saidKeto, sounding exhausted at the prospect. "Back on the bed."Keto pulled out some equipment and started testing Dean for somethings andnot for others.<BACK IN PARROTTS>"Would Jay Chrysler, Phil Febuggure and Captain Chrysler please comeimmediately to the medibay." came over the intercom, the music cutting outfor the announcement's duration.Phil, Jay and Alotta left the bar where they had been drinking, and lumbered,weaved and walked (respectively) their way up towards the medibay."Whatttch?" slurred Jay."Oh god." said Keto, "You need to be sober for this." Then, he took a tubeof ointment out of his pocket and forced some down the throats of the 3bystanders. Who promptly coughed, spluttered, gasped and then threw up onthe floor."Smeg! What was that for?" asked Phil,"I was sober too!" said Alotta."Well, now you all are. Look at this."Keto led them through to the operating room and showed them a sheaf ofpapers, covered with numbers."Wow! You can right out a series of numbers." said Jay, irritably, "why'dyou call us up here.""Well, this should be a 0. But it's a 1.""Prizes for observation." said Jay."Well, what it means is that Dean here has something metal in his brain.""Probably some shrapnel or something from one of the large battles thatwe've all been involved in. Such as bar brawls...other bar brawls...""Well, I thought so too. Look at this." and Keto led them over to theoperating table, where Dean was lying, knocked out, with a series of tubeslying around and in his body, and a gruesome looking instrument over hishead, which currently had a probe poking out of the machinery and up Dean'snostril.Keto indicated the TV screen."What's that?" asked Phil, staring at the image."I believe it's a microchip." said WW, staring hard at it."Correct." said Keto, "But, if I zoom in." He did so."My god!" said Phil"Evil Keto & Cerebrum Miming Empires Inc." read Jay."So that microchip comes from the alternate reality?""It must do. After all, we didn't alter our timeline, merely adopted a new one. So what happened there is still memorable and real." said Phil."Well, even so." said Alotta, pacing slowly. "Why don't you just remove thechip.""I can't. Not from the outside." said Keto. "It might turn him into agibbering vegetable if I get it wrong. Whilst I see no problem, NurseStarbolt would probably viciously attack me. We need to get inside of Dean.Obviously this is impossible.""What do you mean?" asked Jay."Well, for example. Get inside of Dean. Physically inside of him, and cut itout from in there.""That IS impossible." said Jay."No." said Phil. "A few alterations to the wormhole drive in my lab and it could work. All we do is shrink the exit hole, and it should be compressed when it comes out. We could shrink a Blue Midget and the things inside it down small enough to get inside of him.""Would it be safe?" asked Alotta, still pacing."No." said Phil, straight away. "No Guarantees.""We'll continue this discussion with Niples." said Alotta, "He'll know best.Let's go to his quarters. He's probably there still cleaning up after his,ahem, party."<IN NIPLES' QUARTERS>They entered as seymour was scrubbing the floor with a hanky tied around hishead. "Damned stains wont come out!" he femininely moaned.<after they updated the Ambassador>"...so, you can see our problem." finished Alotta."I see." Niples sat down on the bronco. It promptly threw him over and intothe opposite wall. "Blasted thing." he muttered, getting up."Actually, there's a further complication." said Keto."What? It gets worse?" asked Jay."Well, my analysis of that chip says it was broadcasting a signal.""Yeah, but to Keto & Cerebrum's Evil Empire. Which doesn't exist. Noproblem." said Niples."Well, yes, but it's broadbasting on space frequency 782.57284" said Keto,reading it off a piece of paper."So?" asked Jay"I see where this is going." said Phil. "Space Frequencies within the 700 -899 Range are reserved for governmental organisations.""uh-huh?" said Alotta."Well, 750 - 809 are reserved for the prison department.""So, you're telling me, that Dean is now broadcasting a signal to the prisondepartment?""Actaully, he's broadcasting as an escaped convict." said Keto, "We'll havethe marines down on us in no time.""GET THAT THING OUT OF HIM NOW!" yelled Jay, and, whilst the others ran backto the medibay, (apart from Phil, who went to the lab), Jay read out a listof people to come straight to his office."Alota, Johnny B Goode, Keats, Jack, Kara, Canazza, and Tara."When they arrived at his office, Jay let them in. "Ok, this is top secret.You, along with Niples, Keto, Phil and myself are all to be shrunk down andplaced inside Dean to perform a ground-breaking medical manouver. Meet inPhil's lab at 0500 hours...""Jay. That's been and gone. It's 7:32 right now.""Ok, right, 0900 hours then. Ok?"Dean "Oh, I'm comatose" Thomas(Actually, Seymour helped. A bit. Maybe (oi- I still did something! -Onion). Make it a JP :))<OOC: Ok, this is the action guys. Let's go go go!! Those of you on theoutside, don't worry! There's plenty for you to do too! See next ACTION postfor details!>JMC's  best....brightest....the most drunk.....www.BlueDwarf.co.uk-Your number one resource in all things Blue Dwarf related,Edit your crewroster profile today!To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:JMC_Blue_Dwarf-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.comYour use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.