The hamster attempts a car jacking...

Who: Darth hamster, who else?
Where: Somewhere in space between the Death jar and the two Bd's...
When: I think just after Dave Canazza did some head banging, or was
that punk rocking?!?
<snip>
"Damn, what's going on" WW pressed some buttons, "They've gone into
an evasive pattern i've never seen before. It's not JMC anyway, heck,
it's not even bleedin' GELF"
Startled, he attempted to compensate, "Smeg! There is no pattern to
it, I can't get a positive lock," frustrated he veered off looking
for another target
</snip>
As he flew off, his ship entered the Mime field and everything went
monochromatic, (okay, a little more than it usually was...), and
deathly silent, (ok, *alot* more silent than it usually was...)
"Damn, I've been mimed!" Mimed the Dark Lord in extreme annoyance, as
he reached for his jar of de-mimification ointment.
He stuck out his tongue and slathered a liberal amount of ointment on
it, then shrieked out "GAH!!!!!" Spluttering the remainder all over
his control console.
Then his onboard computer started singing "Daisy, Daisy..." as the
face of Holly slowly appeared on the screens.
"Aw Smeg - the emporers ointments Hollyed my navicomputer again!"
lamented the Dark Lord as he suddenly lost control of his spacecraft
and it began to spin about wildly causing the internal gravity to
fail which made everything start to float about free.
"Now lessee, what was the recipe for the antidote?" Muttered the Dark
Lord frenetically grabbing at the ointment bottles floating about him
and pulling out a notepad and reading off the list, "One part de-
hamsterfication ointment (vinegar), one part migraine cure ointment
(canola oil), one part ferret maker ointment (a bad mcdonald's coca
cola slurpee), and four parts clarified Midget preserves..."
He paused looking about the cockpit and then growled, "I *knew* I
shouldn't have let that little perv outta my sight!"
Then he glanced out the viewport and saw a ship quickly approaching,
and pulled on his A.D.A.M. suit* while reaching over and punching
the 'patented' emergency landing button. Whereupon the ship rapidly
darted forward and rear-ended the Phoenix.
And as the craft tore into the Phoenix's hull, the Dark Lord climbs
up into the Phoenix's cockpit pointing one of the A.D.A.M Suits buff
looking arm mounted blastalot cannon's at Jay and yells, "Move over
Skyboy! I'm taking over this flopship of yours." as the Dark Lord's
ship automatically deploys space sealant to close up the hole behind
him.
"FLOPSHIP?!? It wasn't a flopship until you rear ended it!" exclaimed
the livid Jay.
"I see that you aren't going to cooperate." Said the Dark Lord, and
quietly pulled the weapons trigger...
Whereupon the A.D.A.M. suit quickly started jiggling and shaking
madly as steam started whistling through it's various rivets and
bolts when it suddenly came apart completely and fell in a heap to
the startled Dark Lord's feet.
"Crummy hardware beta testers..." Muttered the Darth hamster in
annoyance.
<Tag Andy/Jay!>
-------
* - Another Damn Annoying Machine.
- White Wolf
Your once & future Captain!