Enter the Clowns...

OOC: I'm sorry to see you leave and sorely miss you, Jon/Elwood -
Your posts quickly became one of those that I looked forward to
reading! And remember, you always welcome if you ever get a chance to
come back rejoin us! :)
- White Wolf
RPG:
====
Who: The Other Dark lord.
Where: In a sea of Clowns.
When: Just as the invasion of the floppy foots was getting more than
just a little annoying.
The black clad figure of the dark lord moved through the virtual
tidal wave of brightly colored clowns as if he were a salmon swimming
upstream. When he saw a batch of three Clown generals, He came to a
stop and ordered, "Take this midget to the conversion chambers."
The first of the clown generals nervously glanced at the second of
clown generals who merely squeaked his red horn, while the third
tried to look like he didn't notice anything wrong while
striaghtening his nametag, which read "R. McDonald". Then the first
clown general replied, "I'm sorry sir, But I think we won't be able
to do that."
The Dark lord growled in annoyance and singlely handedly drew his
laser lance and quickly slashed the clown general into four peices
with two vicious slashes, the second clown general spoke up
quickly, "Sir, I think what Bob met was that it would rather
difficult for us since your only holding some tiny man's empty
shoe..."
The Dark Lord glanced down at where he was originally dragging MP by
his leg and saw the empty shoe he'd been dragging through the clown
mob and bellowed "Somebody stole my midget!"
Then the Dark Lord paused for a moment to quickly feel through his
pockets before adding angrily, "As well as my car keys & Diner's
card! You supposed to be in charge of security..." as he quickly
slashed the second clown general in twain.
The third clown general quickly bent too scoop up a card & set of
keys off the floor and offer them to the Dark Lord while
saying, "Here they are Sir - you dropped them when you were drawing
your laser lance."
"Oh..." said the Dark Lord while making them back and sounding a bit
miffed, "Just make sure it doesn't happen again, General."
"Ye-Ye-Yes, Sir." Stammered the last remaining clown general.
"MMmmm, I feel hungry - have we got anything to eat onboard already?
I'd like to have something with a krispy kreme donut." Asked the Dark
Lord holding his hand to his growling stomach.
"Right this way, Sir." Said the last remaining clown general with
more confidence that he was up to this task as he motioned and
started walking towards the empire ship behind him. Then a
ventilation grill next to him exploded spewing out several dozen
cripsy clowns on top of him. (See msg# 7307 for where they came
from...)
The Dark Lord paused and eyed the pile with the now dead third clown
general for a moment, then reached into his belt and pulled out a
fork and knelt to test poke one of the nearest crispy clowns with it
and said, "*Hmphf*, Overdone. But I've got to hand it to Ronald, he
did have fast service even though he got my meal order completely
wrong."
The Dark Lord then stood back up and turned with a flourish of his
black cape toward some clown commando's who were lottering nearby as
a small clown red colored fire & rescue car pull up and disgorged
several clowns bearing stretchers, and exclaimed "The three amongst
you who can fetch my meal the fastest shall be the next clown
general's!"
Several of the clown commando's turned and started dashing toward the
empire ships, and when they couldn't all fit through the door at the
same time, they turned thier ointment squirting flowers on one
another and began squirting trying to eliminate the competition.
"You idiots, You've all taken the antidote!" Said the Dark Lord while
he slapped his face in annoyance, "Why couldn't the emporers just
hire proper Shock troops like I asked?"
Several of the clown stopped and paused in thought, then they pulled
out rubber chickens, foam bats, and pails of confetti and then went
back to pummeling one another - as the crowd slowly reduced in to
four clown combatants, a mime waved for a halt of hostilities.
The other three stopped, wondering what was up. Then the Mime made a
motion as if he were surrendering by offering the other three clowns
a handshake. One of the three other clowns foolishly stepped forward
and shook it, getting zapped to a crisp as the mime revealed a large
joy buzzer in his hand. The two other remaining clowns smiled and
patted the mime on the back in congratulations as the second
serriptitously slipped a bundle of TNT with a short lit fuse down the
back of the mime's pants, and the third clown used a shoe squirter to
cover thier clown feet in instant glue while quickly turning to dash
off, but ran into the mime's invisible wall just before the three
exploded as the bundle of TNT went off.
"Perhaps I should order some take out instead, if I intend to
actually eat today." Muttered the Dark Lord, striding off towards
Parrots & the Promenade.
<Several minutes later, in the Garvey Commons food vending area...>
Pandemonium reigned as the Dark Lord made his way through the parting
crowds of Blue Dwarf Inhabitants & Clown combatants and on up to a
sandwich-vend, where he inserted his diner's card into the card slot.
The sandwich-vend's little screen flashed "Please try again." and
rejected his card. The Dark Lord grabbed his card back and re-
inserted it. Again the little screen flashed "Please try again." and
returned his card. The Dark Lord growled in annoyance and stepped
over to a different vending machine and jammed his card in, and
little screen flashed "Did you actually think your card would work
any better over here? (y/n).".
Outraged, the Dark Lord punched the machine, and it's little screen
flashed in response, "If that's the way your going to be about it -
Card Declined, Weinerbreath." And ejected his card out into his face.
Green faced & livid with fury the Dark Lord grabbed the machine and
threw it to the floor, started jumping on it and pounding on with his
fists and the little screen flashed, "Nyah, Nyah - you can't hurt me!"
The Dark Lord stopped, then drew & activated his laser lance, and the
little screen quickly flashed, "Uh Oh! Me and my big mouth..." as the
Dark Lord quickly slashed open it's insides along with several of the
other vending machine and then began shoving the food content's into
his pockets greedily, as some inebriated Blue Dwarf crewmember
strolling by from Parrots screamed "Free food!" causing a riot as
both the clowns and Blue Dwarf inhabitants momentarily stopped
fighting one another and dashed over to swipe everything that wasn't
nailed down along with quite a few things that *were* nailed down
like the Mc Donalds golden arches, and half the wooden bar from
parrots complete with six drinking patrons sitting on bar stools and
one assistant bartender who was still busily mixing up some drinks as
the stolen bar was being transported on by the Dark Lord who was
watching uninterestedly and grabbed a Mike's Hard lemonade off the
bar as it went by. A waitress quickly handed him a napkin that was
advertising Parrots tuesday night 'Happy Hour' as she ran by keep up
with the slowly disappearing bar.
<Tag!>
- White Wolf
Your once & future Captain!