Niples "Captain again"

Ambassador-“Acting Captain” Niples
Drive room
Seymour was thrilled to bits. It had been a long time since he was
transferred from Captain to Ambassador, he missed the job terribly much.
Especially being able to boss people around, although he did still try.
He strolled into the Driveroom with an air of confidence and
professionalism, his uniform being freshly ironed, his trousers being
freshly pressed. “Theres something wonderfully endearing about a crisp new
uniform, it makes one feel like a man, like one has a purpose in life, to be
a part of something greater” He forcefully babbled to Ensign Queck.
“Yes sir” Queck replied. “But that uniform got replaced by a new one 3
months ago.”
“Dammit!” Seymour cursed. “Why was I not informed? As Ambassador I’m still
an important, key member of this ship aren’t I?”
“Erm….righto sir.”
Seymour cleared his throat and changed the subject, scowling at Queck, he
didn’t like anyone who took that kind of tone with him.
“So….Mr Yu’wanKar, what is our position?”
“Well this..erm…..we’re relative astrological position 1263.5 mark 8426.7 by
4759 and erm…. Point six? Yes six.”
Seymour wasn’t sure whare they were supposed to be, it had been a while
since he had seen an astrological chart.
“Erm…jolly good. Keep it up!”
Seymour turned to Queck again. “Any news on the Ambassadors? Amber was
supposed to be bringing them inside and giving them a tour of the ship. I
didn’t trust that mini fellow.”
Queck looked at his logs. “Theres nothing recorded sir, they might still be
outside”
Seymour turned on his heel and went down to the airlock.
Outside on the hull.
Seymour looked through his spacesuit helmet and saw the Ambassadors in their
spacesuits, each spacuit had special tartan trousers. Seymour had prepared
them for himself whenever he wanted to play golf outside. They were all
holding golf clubs and seemed to be milling around the area unsure of what
to do.
Then he saw what they were looking at. One of the Ambassadors was floating a
few meters above the hull, spinning and thrashing his legs. His magnetic
boots had obviously become unstuck from the hull.
MP was stood with his hands in his pockets trying to ignore the situation.
“Mini Phil!!!!” Seymour bellowed. MP almost jumped out of his spacesuit and
put his arms in a reflex action contemplating running.
“Get him down, get him down right now!!”
MP looked at the floating Ambassador and then silently legged it.
-Onion
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