If I Only Had a Brain... (Chris and Sean megathon)
Who: Trisees, Robot1A.
Where: Supply field B
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Trisees looked down at the robot's head and repeated his question.
"Who are you?"
There were a few clicks and whirrs from the robot's head as it processed the words, before spitting out
it's own sentence.
"I'm Charles Keto. Who are YOU?" it replied.
Trisees said nothing, and simply frowned at the machine in front of him. "Must be an error," he mutted to
himself before switching his creation off. He sighed and took a wrench to the contraption again, smashing
some of the circuit boards a little, before turning it on again.
"Let me try that once more, who are YOU?"
"I'm Charles Keto, and you've just connected my sense of smell. Please disconnect it RIGHT NOW."
Trisees sighed.
"Why do you keep saying you're Charles Keto? Charles Keto is the chief medical Doctor. I know he's
intelligent, but I refuse to believe he was born with two brains and had one removed," he stated. "And
WHAT smell are you talking about?!" he added, angrily. He'd just taken a shower.
"The smell that's short-circuited by those two blue wires there. It's making my non-existant nose itch. You're not very good at this whole wiring-a-disembodied-brain-into-a-robot thing, are you?" asked the robot again.
"Give me my due, it's a process that usually takes upwards of months. I lawrence Trisees, mental technology spcilist, accomplished this feat in 6 hours," replied Trisees with a large amount of pride. "I'd like to see you try," he muttered under his breath.
"Then I'm impressed. It took the other guy at least a week to get a simple text interface working. You're obviously of a higher rank."
"Higher rank?" Scoffed Trisees loudly. "Alas no I'm merely a Commander, the crew hates me aside from one fellow. A Charles Keto, who you currently claim to be."
There was a pause.
"...odd," said the brain, "What about Technician Ake?"
"Technician Ake? What in the...Where do you think you are?"
"In the West Wing of the Medical School, of course," replied the brain, "Is Alan ill or something?"
Trisees sighed, rolled his eyes and silently wondered why it's always seemed to be up to him to fix situations like this.
"You're no way near medical school anymore. You're on a ship, in deep space, piloted by a couple of misfits, captained by an even bigger misfit, crewed by even more horrifyingly misfit like people. I'm sorry."
There is another, longer pause.
"Well," says the brain eventually, with a little squiggle on one of the instruments indicating that it tried to shrug but the robot's servo-motors didn't move that way, "I suppose it could be worse. Got to make the best of a bad situation, I suppose. So if I'm on a ship, what am I doing here?"
"I've no idea. I found your brain in a jar on our Charles Keto's ointment shelf. And I decided to see if you still lived."
"Well, of course I do!" says the brain, with what might have been a laugh, "How else would I be able to answer all those questions and things?"
"This was BEFORE I acivated you."
"Well...yes," says the brain slowly.
"I wonder if Keto knows anything about this," Trisees mused.
"Of course I do..."
Trisees sighs "The other Keto, I was musing. Maybe if I call you K2, and the other one K1 it'll be easier"
"Quite a coincidence, really," murmurs the brain, "Someone else with the same name as me."
"A coincidence? Surely you didn't think that Keto was a completely unique name? Didn't you have any brothers or sisters?"
"No, I was an only child," shrugs the brain again.
"Well, neither did I but I'm sure there are other Trisees in this universe," the scientist admitted.
"I guess you're right," says the brain, "Now then...what did you want to ask me today?"
"I'm always right. Its a gift. I just wanted to know who you are. Now that I have found out, all that remains is to approach K1 and ask him to explain."
"Okay," chirps the brain, "Should I go back to sleep then?"
"No, you can come to," frowned Trisees. "Wouldn't be much point me going alone"
"Sure. Umm...could you please turn my eyes on? If I'm in a new place I'd like to be able to see it..."
Trisees frowned, again and began attempting a few modifications to the side of the robot, suddenly watching as few leds on one side of the robot lit up.
"WAH!" yelled the brain suddenly, before coughing loudly, "Oh. Sorry. Wasn't prepared for that."
"What happened?"
"Well, I haven't actually seen anything for about a dozen years. The light was a bit of a shock."
"You mean you've been active whilst in that jar?"
"Most of the time I was sleeping. Well, I call it sleeping. It's what I call it when I don't do anything."
Trisees nodded, a little worriedly.
"It conserves the fluid, you see," it added.
"Oh, so this fluid, is it vital? I take it it is."
"Oh yes," said the brain, the robot's head nodding, "And unfortunately it denatures after about a week. A bit longer if I sleep a lot, but not much. But it's alright, Alan always refills it before that time." "Who is this alan?"
"Alan Francis Ake," responds the brain, "He's the one who's looked after me while I've been like this." "I think we'd betetr go see our Keto," said Trisees, his mind working fervishly.
"Right-ho!" said the robot with a triumphantair. After a few moment of doing nothing it looked at Trisees. There was a long pause while Trisees stared at it. Eventually it said, "Umm...I think my motors need connecting too."
Trisees growls. And started modifying the side of the robot again, taking a larger wrench and panel beating a few more pristine circuits. There was a click, and the wheels of the robot's feet started moving.
"I think that's iiiiiiiiiiitttt!" squealed the robot as it shot out of the room and skidded down the corridor, becoming a blur.
Trisees shook his head and threw his arms up to the sky, "It's always me! What, do I have I huge bullseye saying 'idiots come here' painted on me?"
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OOC: Joint post by the illustrious Chris and myself. Look out for MANY more of these coming soon.