Smutty Cues?

Damn you Phil! Jay's bit was the main purpose of me post, I suggest the following:

"Oi Jay...dont fling balls at my daughter" Said Phil. "Ohh...another £50!"

Dean was still smarting from the indignity of being whacked by a ball, and decided to get his own back on Jay.
 
"Yeh, well, he'll need it, after all, I hear that Amber has spent over £30,000 of Jay's money on plastic surgery (to improve his mug), and some of that also went on pedicure, manicure, a new haircut, oh, and some clothes..."
 
Everyone watched as Rio suddenly sprinted out of the hall, attention returned to the pool game in time to see the cue finally drop to the felt.
 
"Is that true?" asked Phil
 
"Nope, but he shouldn't have hit me."
"That is a point."
"Ahh...deception can be so refreshing, now to get a REAL drink!" said Amber, heading towards the bar, Phil tripped her up, and she fell at the feet of none other then Jasmine Starbolt.
"Erm...hey," said Amber, looking up.
"She'll have a coke." said Phil to Owen.
 
MP rolled on the floor with laughter
"What's the matter with him?" asked Owen
 
"Oh nothing...Although of course you realise  that under any other ciccumstances, me saying ""Oi Jay...dont fling your balls at my daughter" would also result in me flushing Jay's head down the toilet AFTER Dean had a curry..."
 
"Ohhhh nasty"
 
"indeed"
 
Owen meanwhile had got out a great big cross and was holding in front of him....
 
"Why you holding that cross?"
 
There was another moan from the table as the words "I've never seen a woman do that with my balls before" floated across the bar.
 
"Well lets see, you've downed a PINT of JD's and your not drunk....."
 
"Ah yes, must be a delayed factor"
 
"I'll be off home now, " Said Dean/Amber who was starting to move out the bar very slowley.
 
Phil was tapped on the shoulder
 
"You Febuggure?"
 
"Yes? Why?"
 
"I need you to sign for this. There was no answer at your quarters.."
 
Phil took the pad that was offered to him..IT was addressed to Amber for some odd reason.
 
"What is it?" Asked Phil, giving the pad back afetr signing for it.
 
"A full length mirror and a tramplone.."
 
Phil turned towards Dean/Amber..
 
"Well young "lady" what have you got to say for yourself?"
 
That seems to work...