Re: [JMC_Blue_Dwarf] Gnome Flinging...Is it Bad for your \'elf

"Alota, you're the comms officer, you'll probably have a better chance than the rest of us to figure out these doo-hickeys upstairs. you should head up to the control tower and contact the ship, the rest of us,...we fight" Jay said.
"Um..." Cerebrum started "Would you mean all of us?"
"Those of us with spines yes"
"Did I ever tell you I was born invertebrate?"
"No you didnt, but if you dont go out there and fight I can arrange it!"
"I'll grab a gun" Cerebrum said panicking.
The posse headed out into the airfield, armed with bazookoids and whatever else they could find and started blasting in every direction across the shuttle port.
"Damn, these guys are UGLY!" Vanessa said in her usual superficial manner.
"Now thats not nice" Phil replied, "They're simply 'aestetically challenged'" he said as he shot a blast through Vanessa's projection blowing the legs off a bug behind her.
"Please dont do that again, have you any idea how annoying that is?"
"Well....yeah actually..." he said, and did the same with Kara's projection.
Jay was fighting in a samll group that consisted of Gail and her TV crew, although quite what use they were was debatable, and Patrick Cerebrum.
Cerebrum was squealing like a five year old girl at all the loud bangs, while Gail was simply trying to get an interview with Jay.
Jay let off a few bazookoid rounds, dazing a few beetles but never actually killing any of them. "This is stupid, for every shot I fire, 2 more beetles appear, and the pnes I shoot DONT DIE!!!!" he lost his patience "GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!""""
He yelled, firing shot after shot after shot after shot.
"hey....where did they go?"
Phils vocie came across the airfield "JAY! UP THERE!"
Jay turned around and looked up where FeBuggure was pointing, the bugs had started to climb the control tower, Phil, Cerebrum, Kara, MP and Vanessa raised theyre bazooikoids
"HEY what the hell are you doing?!" Jay said, "You'll blow the tower apart! and MY WIFES IN THERE!!!"
"what do you suggest bro?" Vanessa  asked
"WELL SHOOTING YOUR SISTER IN LAW AINT MY FIRST RECOMMENDATION!"
"If I may?" Cerebrum offered "Distracting them somehow"
"How?"
Jay rembembered Mini-Phil's comment about the garage.
"be right back."
He legged it across the field into the garage Mini-Phil had mentioned, hoping to find something to start a fire or something, to attract the buigs away from Alota.
What he did see however was one of the small ant bugs sipping on one of the many Stella cans. He watched in wide-eyed awe as it's stomach expanded and it exploded.
He grinned.
He knew what to do.
 
Outside Phil was getting frustrated, "If he doenst hurry up, were gonna HAVE to open fire! one at a time, low power, hopefully we'll stun the bugs enough to get them away from...."
His voice was drowned by the roar of a engine, the group turned to see a sunglasses wearing Jay, roaring over on the motorcycle Mp had told them about, tosing cans of lager at the bugs like grenades,  after a few explosions, the bugs turned they're attention to this new threat, and followed the speeding pilot, of across the airfiled and out the front gates.
"Well that was......interesting" said Phil.
"eeee!"
 
<next?>
 
 
 

----- Original Message -----
From: Christopher Kentlea
To: JMC_Blue_Dwarf
Sent: Monday, August 12, 2002 9:08 PM
Subject: [JMC_Blue_Dwarf] Gnome Flinging...Is it Bad for your 'elf

Who : Those with Phil...(Yes I'm lazy today)
Where : See above
 
"eee"
"Glad to see your okay Kara..." Remarked Phil, as Kara jumped off the beetle
 
"No prbs...can you do something about your midget..."
 
"Sure..MP...Deal with the beetle queen will you..."
 
"eeep"
 
"eeep? That's a new one!" remarked Jay sarcasticly
 
"You two don't get on do you?" asked Gail, holding a microphone pratically up Jay's nose...
 
"Nope...I hate him as much as I get on with Phil..." replied Jay, eyeing the midget who had shoved his hand downs the queen beetles...well he hoped it was her mouth or she was going to be VERY upset...
 
"EEEEEEEEEEE"
 
"Translation people : Duck!" cried Phil, hiding behind the nearest person.
 
"Where?" Asked Niples, shortly before he was covered in exploding beetle.
 
"Well, now that's over with, " Said Phil, coming out from behind Cerebrum, who was now covered in beetle...insides..."I suggest we make a run for that comms tower...Those beetles look a bit distracted, but i rekon it's not going to be long before they relaise what we did and we become as popular as a bean-fart in a crowded lift..."
 
"So we should run yes?" asked Niples.
 
"Well as you you're no longer Captain , I think I can say...YES WE RUN YOU STUPID GIMP!"
 
With That Phil took off for the tower, shotting anything insect-like that got close..
 
** 2 mins later, at the tower **
 
"Okay people..this is the situation we have here..."
 
Phil waited whilst people caught their breath back..
 
"We are in a tower, surronded by bugs. We need someone to go and man the comms unit and contact the BD to send a ship or something..."
 
"What about the bugs and the spider ships..." asked Alota.
 
"Well, MP and myself, plus 1 other need to go on the roof and blast those spider ships.."
 
"With what man are you mad?" Cried Niples, just getting the Gimp reference from earlier.
 
"Nope, but by one of those strange coincedence that seem to affect this crew , MP found some stuff in the garage downstairs which I can cobble together to make a impropmtue weapon..."
 
"Garage? What else was in there dude?" asked Jay to MP....
 
"Eeee -brrrrrmmmm - EEEEEE!"
 
"A motobike....Intresting, where was it?"
 
"eeee  ----*belch-------EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"
 
"Next to a years supply of Stella?"...Jay's eyes started to happly mist at the thought of all that beer.
 
Alota looked sharpley over at her husband..."Jay Montegue Chrysler, don't even think about it..."
 
Jay had a "What?!?" expression on his face.
 
"So, " said Phil, interrrupting Jay's dream..."Who's goning to man the comms, cos everyone else is going to have to keep the bugs at bay down here..."
 
<<Who's it going to be?>>
 
 
 
 
OOC : A freindly compo...lets see who can write the most "punny" title for a post
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