Captain Niples "Captain Hero"

<<Ooh Roskev, that's a nasty power!>>
 
Captain Seymour Niples
Planet Plebe
The city of Maxomegopolis
 
Seymour had caught the shuttle piloted by Efof, the four armed Ffionian. They had landed on the outskirts of the city in a B&Q warehouse carpark. Efof followed Niples as he walked into the city.
"So what are we going to do Cap'n?" said Efof, looking around at the new world. Efof had never hardly ever been to any planets except his own, which used to be a beautiful paradise world. His curious nature made him excited about seeing a new planet.
"I'm going to find someone in charge and negotiate Efof." replied the captain.
"Why?" said the ever-curious alien.
"Erm... because it's good to know peoplein high places, they might be able to help us. Give us food, supplies, things like that."
"But don't we have field rations?"
""Hmpff. Have you ever tasted J.M.C emergency field rations?"
"When I was on Ffion, our field rations tasted like fresh strawberries and cream. Isn't that what our rations taste like?" Said the naive Ffionian.
"I very much doubt it Efof."
 
They walked along a main road, Seymour had told the others to find public transport so he had to do the same. Efof pointed at something further down the road.
"Isn't that a bus? We should get on it. We used to have busses on Ffion you know."
 
The bus stopped beside them but Captain Niples continued walking.
"Captain?" Efof bounded alongside the Captain like an excited child. "Aren't we going to catch the bus? The busses on Ffion all had comfy armchairs and played tranquil music. Some inner-city ones even had complimentary massages. Why aren't we getting on it?"
"We're not on Ffion now Efof. And we're not getting on a bus."
Efof looked hurt and continued following the captain.
 
Minutes later Efof saw a car with the word taxi on the side, he jumped up and down excitedly and flagged the taxi over. "look look! It's a taxi! The taxi's on Ffion were great, they had room for a double bed in the back and the taxi drivers were always soooo polite..."
"We're not getting in a taxi Efof."
Efof sighed and continued following the Captain, he looked in excitement at great things he'd never seen before, like pollution, dirty pavements, litter and old ladies being made to cross the road on their own.
 
Suddenly, Seymour heard something from far away. It was a cry of help.
"Wait here Efof, I'll be right back." he said and followed the noise. It was coming from a building somewhere above him, he looked up and saw a woman dangling off a window ledge. "If only there is something I could do...." he said, then realised there was something.
 
He went into the nearest phone box to change his clothes, he had taken the silk red bath robe off as he had found some proper day-clothes, but was still carrying it around just in case he got cold. He put it on and tied the waist ribbon. He wet his hand and stroked his hair backwards so that if any of his crew say him they wouldn't instantly recognise who he was, he might be a little embarassed if they saw what he was about to do.
 
He got out of the pone box, his silk robe hanging around him like a cloak. He put his fist in the air and used his newfound special power. He used the wind to make him fly into the air, he flew all the way up to the ladge where the woman was holding on for her life.
 
He hovvered there and put his clenched fists on his hips. "Having..." he stopped to re-adjust his voice to sound more bold and powerful.
"Having trouble there miss?"
The woman looked around in shock and accidentally let go with one hand. (Plebes of course aren't that bright.) She couldn't hold on with the one hand so slipped and plumetted downwards. Niples had no choice but to fly down and get her. He couldn't believe what he was doing, he was almost 30 years old and he was flying around the sky wearing a red dressing gown.
 
He flew underneath the falling woman and caught her in his arms. He slowly started flying back up to the ledge she fell from. The woman looked him in the eyes, "You saved me! You're such a hero!" she said meldramatically. "What shall I call my saviour?"
"Captain....." He started but then realied he should probably keep his real identity secret. "Erm...I mean... Captain... Hero. Captain Hero, that's my name!"
 
"Thank you Captain Hero!" said the woman as he put her back on the balcony that she fell from. He hovere there for a second before swiping his silk cloak as he turned and flew away.
 
**A few minutes later...**
 
Efof watched in amzement as some slow thugs tried to steal an old ladies purse but were beaten off by her umbrella. They never had muggings on Ffion.
 
He turned around to see the Captain coming back, he was stroking his hair back forward.
"You'll never guess what i just heard!" said Efof excitedly. "I heard that a superhero just saved a woman from falling, cool huh?! Its just like that on TV about a man who has super powers but works for a newspaper company, I can't remember his name- Trevor McDonald or something."
 
"Really? That's facinating." said Niples. He walked out into the street and stopped the car he'd been hoping for. It was a black limousine. He climbed in with Efof and spoke to the driver.
"Can you take me to see the Governor please."
"The Governor?" replied the slow-witted driver.
"Yes, the governor of this city." Seymour said, hoping that it had one.
"Oh, THAT governor." The driver set off.
 
<<Saving women in distress? Whatever next? Find out next time!>>