Re: Still cowering

> Is it safe to com eout yet L'ontar thought to himself.
> " Holly, what the smeg is going?"
> The ships computer popped up onto the screen and began
> to explain what was going on. Slowly emerging from his
> brave hiding place. L'ontar walked towards the door
> and out into the corridor straight into ...
------------------------------------------------------------------------
... a guy who just kept walking down the corridor without giving the
GELF a second look.
Dirk was still walking around in the same unkept look he had when he
went to the Science Lab. After a short five hour nap, he awoke and
started to walk down the ship aimless and barefoot. There seemed to
be some sort of commotion going on all around the ship. Who knows
what it was? Who cared? There was some totally asinine situation
happening every week on this ship.
He turned a corner to head to the lifts. As one of the lift doors
opened, Dirk stood face to face with an image that looked like him,
only cleaner. "I hope you're not planning on doing that whole bit
with you scratching your head to see if I scratch mine, so on and so
forth," the image said to him.
"Hell no! That's way too cliche."
"Good. I was hoping that you would be smarter than that."
"Of course. Now, all I have to do is figure out the situation I'm in
so that I can form the proper course of action. Do you have any
memory of a childhood?"
"Sure do."
"How about your professional career?"
"Absolutely. I started out as a research scientist on Earth before
being assigned to the Red Dwarf."
"Red Dwarf, eh?" Dirk mulled this over in his mind. "Since I've
never been assigned to that ship, yet you have a perfect memory of it,
I'll have to assume that you are not a clone of me."
"No, I'm not. That leaves the option of dimensional transferrance.
Are you left handed?"
"No, I'm right handed. That would show a sign of an exact physical
makeup with the exception of synaptic functions meaning an alternation
of psychological matrixes."
"Is psychology one of your areas of expertise?" his double asked him.
"Nope. I read a great pschological thriller once. It had some good
info in it." He paused to get back on track. "So, with these facts,
a good hypothesis would be that either the Blue Dwarf or your Red
Dwarf originated from an alternate universe from the one it now
inhabits which leaves a few more questions. Are you the evil
embodiment of me?"
"No."
"Are you the good embodiment of me, then?"
"No, not that either. You see, since it is obvious that the main
differences between our dimensions is the switching of the ideals of
good and evil causing good people to be evil and vice versa in each of
our relative universes, the fact that my personality is one of
indifference leads to the inability of the main alternate factor to be
applied to your universe. We are not really opposites as much as the
same mental and physical presences within differing circumstances."
Dirk took note of this and broke it down, "So, basically, we're both
inconsiderate bastards."
"But I seem to have a better hygene discipline."