Exponential Medical Adversaries

Chief Plastic Surgeon Hazel Coffey and Doctor/Dramatist William
Shakespeare entered the medibay, arm in arm, discussing the delights
of blue spiked hair, when they noticed the unconscious body of Ensign
Wildflower on the medibay bed.
They stopped dead in their tracks, looks of horrification across
their faces. Ensign Wildflower had been their test subject for the
tranquillisers a few hours ago, and seemed that the tranquillisers,
whilst working in it's intended are, actually had a couple of side
effects.
Shakespeare cursed in medieval tongue.
"Hazel, look what I've doneth!" he said, rushing over to the
medibay bed. Ensign Wildflower was glowing a faint neon yellow, and
her abdomen had enlarged to five times the size,
"My tranquilliser hath made her pregnant within the last eight
hours!" he said shocked. "And she could be hung in the middle of the
room if we ever ran out of light bulbs," he shook his head dejectedly
and began running around the medibay in a frantic panic.
"Now, now, William," said Coffey reassuringly. She walked over to
him. He was picking up bottles and reading the labels to see where
he had gone wrong and throwing them back down in disgust. She lay
her hands on his shoulders, and he stopped, becoming calmer.
"Test her, xray her, see what the problem is, we are, after all,
doctors."
"Yes, good idea, my dear. That's what I should do, yes, test." He
scratched his chin and looked at the radioactive appearing patient.
"This doesn't look good," he muttered, shaking his head sadly.
*
Shakespeare held up the x-ray to the light. Coffey looked over his
shoulder at it.
"What seems to be the problem?" she asked. Shakespeare glanced
over at the wrapped up body of Ensign Wildflower. She had been tied
to the bed, and placed in the cryo area. Her abdomen had enlarged
even more since all the tests had been done, and she looked very
bloated.
"It seems, fair Hazel," said Shakespeare, "that one of her organs
is growing at an exponential rate. In two hours time, if I don't
operate, it will become too big for her body to cope with and it will
literally explode."
"But which organ?" asked Coffey, now staring in concern at
Wildflower's body.
"The appendix," stated Shakespeare.
"But William, I'm a plastic surgeon. I'm more into the aesthetic
side of medical practionery."
Shakespeare stopped for a second and thought hard.
"Ok," he said, coming up with a plan. "I can operate. I may be a
mere playwright, but I hath found a niche in surgery." He pointed to
her stomach.
"I can do the operation alone, and afterwards," he said, walking
over to Coffey and smiling. "You can make her look a million
dollarpounds." He grinned. Coffey smiled, looking innocently at
Shakespeare.
"Sienna? Or cobalt blue hair?" she asked, laughing.
*
The hours passed even more. Shakespeare and Coffey had set up
security locks around the medibay to prevent anyone from coming in
during such a delicate operation. At one point Coffey had heard the
pounding fists of a severely annoyed Keto, but she'd sent him away
and she'd heard no more. She was watching from the main area whilst
Shakespeare worked his medical magic on Ensign Wildflower. She sat
at the chair, behind the glass, just staring as he moved about the
medibay.
He certainly looked to know exactly what he was doing. Her gaze
drifted from his hands up his body to his face. The look of
concentration making him seem even more adorable than before. She
sighed, smiling and staring lazily at his hair, imagining even more
styles she could perform, before going back to his deep blue eyes.
She put her head on her hands, and continued watching.
*
"That was in her?!" asked Coffey, worried. Shakespeare had placed
the offending organ in a cryo storage glass cage. It pulsated and
moved slightly, its size was that of the torso of a teenage man.
"I've never seen an appendix that grotesque before," she said,
still stunned at its size.
It lopped about on the floor and moved up against the walls.
Coffey moved back, making a retching noise.
"It's horrible."
"Unfortunately, it is sentient," said Shakespeare, wiping his hands
on a towel, his black suits arm sleeves rolled up. He wiped the
sweat from his brow, and moved over to the wall to look at the
appendix.
"And seeing as it has sentience, I have to keep it alive."
"But how did it get that? It's an appendix," queried Coffey.
"My tranquilliser and the regen teklice bathroom spray combined and
created some kind of super mutation ointment. It infected her
appendix, and began to change its very core structure. Eight hours
later, and this is the result." He pointed at the appendix and it
jumped up and down in its glass prison.
"What shall we call it?" asked Shakespeare, grinning. Coffey
looked at him unsure for a second, before laughing as well.
"Some reason Appendix A springs to mind," she laughed.
"Then appendix A it is, the second addition to our medibay family
in a day," he said, smiling and throwing the towel onto his desk.