Shakespeare\'s Latest Comedy: Such A Do About Something

With that, Keto stormed back into the elevator and hit the button
for the deck with the medibay on it.
"This really, really isn't my day!" he cursed, knowing that the way
things were going was bound to stop soon - they couldn't get any
worse.
Doctor Keto entered the medibay, a look of total annoyance across
his face and stopped dead in his tracks. He gibbered for a second,
saying nothing and stared at Shakespeare.
Well, at the space where he had left Shakespeare.
Shakespeare had gone. He was not where he'd been left.
"Holly," Keto said VERY slowly.
"Yes, Keto?" he asked.
"Is Shakespeare in the medibay?"
"No."
"Where is he?" he asked, in tones leaden with severe anger.
"I don't know."
"What happened? Where did he go? Why is NO ONE OF ANY HELP ON THIS
DAMN SHIP?!"
Holly was silent and waited for Keto's face to return to its normal
colour.
"He woke up a few mintues ago and began mutterring three words:
Ointmentator, Uranium and Gyroscope. then he ran out with a happy and
slightly dazed look on his face."
"Ointmentator, Uranium...GYROSCOPE?!" asked Keto. He shook his head
worriedly and zipped out of the medibay as quick as he could.
Shakespeare sneaked along the corridors of the BLue Dwarf, aware
that a few people wanted to see him; Keto, Tara, Hazel and Jason. But
he was far too busy with his plans to revolutionise the Ointmentator.
He'd have to accept Smegg's coke. It might just work as well, but he
couldn't be certain. He might need a small moon to test his theories.
He slowly edged along the corridor, keepign close to the wall. He
was nearby the promenade now. He knew he could probably get the glue,
wood and spray paint from McKenzies. The coke from engineering, but
where was he going to get the centerpeice of his renovation from?
Where on Earth could he find a spare gyrocscope. There was always the
Blue Dwarf's actual gyroscope. I mean, space was pretty much empty,
they'd not miss it. He shook his head at the thought of endangering
the crew.
"Don'teth be silly, there are gyroscopes in Starbugs and Blue
Midgets. Justeth take one of them," he told himself.
He hurried along the promenade and stopped dead in his tracks.
"GADZOOKS!!! MERCUTIO!!!" He patted his coat pockets and pulled
out the remote control.
"I had better get our entryeth to thy competition before I do
anything else," Shakespeare turned on his heel and disappeared back
into the spaghetti of corridors that Blue Dwarf mainly comprised of.
------
Hidden in the shadows, it watched the doctor run back and forth.
They were really giving it a run for it's money, it couldn't believe
how difficult it was trying to keep up with them both. Still, it was
the most fun it had had in ages.
------
"Holly? Do you kno where that buffoon is now?" shouted Keto whilst
jogging at high speed in a random direction.
"Sorry, I don't," said Holly. He couldn't tell Keto, he promised
Lawrence that he'd say nothing to anyone about where he was. Except
Niples. Inwardly Holly laughed as Keto became increasingly flustered.
Shakespeare appeared out of the lift with Mercutio. The sheet still
there, but now covered in green stains and an orange liquid.
"Forsooth that is thy best hiding place I hath ever found," he
laughed and badly directed Mercutio along the promenade towards
McKenzies. As he walked, he accidentally tripped slightly and hit the
forwrad stick a little too forcefully. He winced as a female 'Ouch'
could be heard and could see Chief Plastic Surgeon, Hazel Coffey,
gently rubbing her knee. Shakespeare stared at her for a second and
shook his head. He walked over to her. she looked slightly miffed to
say the least.
"Forgive me, fair lady," he said, taking he free hand and gently
kissing the back of it, whilst kneeling and smiling in apology.
"I did not mean to cause thou any grieviances, I am most sorry and
in your debt, if there is any way I could repay thee, I would be
honoured to do so." He looked up into the now smiling face of Haze
Coffey.
"Well, I was about to get a chicken korma," she explained. "but you
look as though your up to far more interesting things, what exactly, I
have no idea."
Shakespeare stood up again.
"I am perfecting mine and the dear doctors Keto's entry for thy
robot wars. I am attempting to acquire various parts to make it thy
ultimate machine. Buteth, its a surprise for Keto and so he does not
know that I hath taken it."
Coffey nodded.
"What are you looking for?"
"Spray paint, superglue, one stick of uranium, some wood, a
gyroscope..." he faltered for a second. "Of course!!!! I mustn't
forget that I also need to have a roll of cloth fifteen feet by seven
feet, bright purple with gold pattern around frilled edges." He
beamed at her.
"Well, shall we go and find them?" she asked. Shakespeare smiled
and followed, Mercutio in tow, as Coffey led him along the promenade
and into the crowds of people that enveloped them.