Fungzilla

The uber-fungling thrashed around in the water, roaring violently as it tried to swipe the gantry once again, just missing by a few feet.

"Think it can reach?" Pickman asked.

"I doubt it," Jay said. "It's just out of reach."

"Now..." Artemis sneered as he slipped the fungal sample into a sealed container, "if you don't mind I have research to conduct."

It was at this time that the uber-fungling noticed a series of chains dangling from the ceiling that were well within the creature's reach. It proceeded to scamper up the chains and jumped onto the gantry behind the group. Its beady eyes glared at the group with hellfire in its eyes.

"LEG IT!!!!" Tanaka shouted.

The group raced through the sump with the megafungus literally biting at their heels. O'Malley glared over at Artemis. "This is your fault, you giant, over-engineered fish bowl!"

"MY fault?" Artemis turned to glare at O'Malley while still flying down the corridor. "You're the git who couldn't screw a stasis tube on tight enough!"

"Do you two have to do this now?" Cass said, trying to run as fast as she could while keeping the lower half of the lab coat from kicking up.

"You had to snip a piece from the biggest, meanest bugger of the lot!" O'Malley continued, ignoring Cass. "When there are literally thousands of the critters running throughout the ship!"

"Smegging stuff it you two!" Tanaka shouted as he brought up the rear. The massive toadstool's talons passed through his head. "Oh and this thing is gaining on us!"

They soon reached the service elevator and Cass violently pressed the call button. "Come on!"

"That thing's still coming!" Jay shouted. "Anyone got a weapon?"

"Still got my nova shine." Thomas slurred.

"It won't work!" Pickman insisted.

"Yes it will! I just..." Thomas was about to explain but was cut off by the sound of Fungzilla barreling down the corridor at them. The lift was still making its way to them.

"We need a distraction!" Jay shouted. He looked around until his eyes fell on Tanaka. "That hard light drive of yours... it makes you indestructible, right?"

Tanaka's eyes widened in horror. "Oh hell no."

Jay rubbed his hands together and prepared himself. "Just roll yourself into a ball and think of England."

"No no no no no no, Jay. Please, I don't wanna!" Tanaka meekly whined as Jay grabbed him by the collar and waistline of his jumpsuit. "Find another chew toy!"

"No time, Tanaka!" Jay hurled the hapless hologram towards the oncoming fungus. "I believe in you!"

Tanaka screamed as Fungzilla caught him in its mouth and began to thrash him around. "Jay you AAHH smeg head! I'll OW make you EEEK pay for this!"

"Give him hell Tanaka!" O'Malley cheered.

"Jay!" Cass exclaimed. "Was that really the best idea you could come up with?"

"Oh come on, Tanaka can handle it!" Jay argued.

"GGGGEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Fungzilla continued to chew and thrash Tanaka about like the T. Rex did to that annoying lawyer in Jurassic Park.

"Punch it in the nose!" Pickman shouted in encouragement.

Artemis's screens turned to Jay, his mouth screen switched to a smarmy smile. "Nice move there, Chrysler."

Finally, after a protracted span of time where there was nothing but constant girly screams and nasty gurgling/growling, the lift doors opened revealing the lift... which was filled with little funglings.

They were clambering over one another while some were climbing up through the service hatch. There was a moment where the group and the funglings stared at one another in silence. The only sound was that of the funglings fiddling about on the top of the lift, and more screams from Tanaka. There was a loud SNAP, apparently one of the funglings managed to chew through the cable, and the lift went crashing down to the bottom floor with the funglings shrieking their high pitched screams all the way down.

"Well... thank god for that." O'Malley murmured in a deadpan tone.

Then Tanaka's saliva covered form crashed into the group. He slowly turned his head to glare at Jay who was in the process of shoving Pickman off of him.

"I. Hate. You." Tanaka said in a tone that could've made Chuck Norris wet himself.

Jay smiled sheepishly. "Hey, it worked, didn't it?" Then the feral fungus growled at them, reminding everyone of the present predicament.

"Ladder!" Cass shouted.

Everyone made a mad dash for the service latter in the elevator shaft. Artemis and Lil' Artie were technically the first into the shaft, but since Artemis was a floating brain in a jar carrying his son he didn't need to use the ladder. So technically O'Malley was the first to reach the ladder, then Tanaka, followed by Pickman, Cass, Jay and lastly Thomas.

"We need to head down!" Jay announced.

So down they went. However, Pickman was having a hard time of it as he was currently getting an eyefull of Cass. Pickman visibly wasn't enjoying the view and proceeded to stammer and stutter while remaining glued to the ladder.

"Well this is fucking great." Cass said in annoyance.

"I didn't... I don't... I'm not.. I'm..." Pickman's brain was probably smoking from the sensory overload.

"Pickman!" O'Malley shouted. "Just look down you silly man!"

Pickman nodded his head up and down in rapid-fire movements before slowly looking down where his eyes widened in horror. "High... high... very high..."

"Oh bugger it! I forgot your fear of heights!" O'Malley said.

"Pickman, buddy," Jay chimed in. "We don't have time for this." The toadstool terror was beginning to sniff around the corners of the lift door.

The giant fungus reared its head to face Thomas Plisken, who was stuck on the ladder right next to the elevator door, his large bottle of nova shine in one hand. The fungling bared its teeth at the gardener, Thomas merely winked and took a swig from the bottle and then spat it in the thing's face. The creature shrieked as its face melted. It panicked and tumbled over the edge and fell down to the burning wreckage of the lift below.

Everyone watched the thing fall and hit the bottom before turning to look up in surprise at Thomas, who was in the process of taking another drink from his bottle.

"Told ya it works." He said with a grin.