Hot Doggin It

On the Blue Dwarf

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After that she wrapped a towel around her neck, sighed and sank to the ground holding her knees to her chest. She was scared she was going to die and never see Jaxx again. The feeling of fear made her tremble as a few tears ran down her face. As she tried to keep her composure she felt something poke her pocket. As she reached into her pocket she found the MP3 player she reclaimed from a prior mech. As she looked at the song list she found the song that she claimed as hers and Jaxx's song. She smiled a bit as she selected the song to play and sing along with.

Eve and Jaxx's Song

Yet another strike tore into the Dwarf; this one plunging the ship into inky darkness.

She did her best to ignore the fear of impending doom in her heart as the only source of light came from her music player. She stayed focus on the song as she wiped her tears away. She knew it was a matter of time before the dwarf was destroyed as she examined her wedding ring to think about Jaxx as she continued to sing.

They heard the next impact as well as felt it; a rumbling shriek of tortured metal in the distance. The Dwarf being torn apart.
<SNIP>

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Meanwhile in a galaxy far far away Franky paused in the pilot seat next to Jaxx as he held his head in pain.

Jaxx asked, "Master? Like is their sumthin wrong?"

He replied, "I'm sorry Jaxx I felt a great disturbance just a moment ago even."

He asked, "Like a thousand people totally screaming then followed by silence?"

He looked at Jaxx funny and said, "Oh heaven's no! More like those Nutrigrain bars coming back up. I don't see how you can eat those things. You better take the wheel even while I toss my cookies."

A few months passed by as Franky and Jaxx were on the Starbug headed out towards Calamar space.

Franky had been working hard to stabilize his new Calamar, (A large aquatic squid body with spider crab legs), body but constantly ran into some technical issues. He was successful in replicating his old body but the trick was to make a younger body since his old body was not long for the world. Of course he did complicate things by making the new Calamar body adaptable for walking and breathing on land.

Jaxx on the other hand passed the time dong his meditative psychic training in diplomacy while in the backroom. During his mental training he found himself on a planet trying to negotiate with the parents of two Calamar kids who wanted to get married despite the lack of approval of both pairs of parents. He was having a lot of trouble just trying to get a word in edgewise as the kids and the parents bickered nonstop leaving him with a pounding headache. The first time he went through this scenario he was confused and tried really hard to please both sides. After over a hundred tries trying to resolve the same scenario, his mind was glazing over as his mouth was drooling to a mind numbing event. Just to make it somewhat interesting Jaxx started to test his options as he started a fight between the bickering couples followed by knocking them out followed by starting a fight with all of them. He even killed a few just to see their reactions. Though he was making no progress he was entertained for a change.

As Franky brainstormed he went through the memories of the other biological crew members he had copied while in their presence. This took a while to go through all the crew’s usable memories since most of them were emotional baggage. As Franky searched through the messed up memories of the neurotic crew members he remembered a prank from one of Eve’s friends named Ensign Tammy May Fly and a random pompous male officer slash womanizer. Tammy was a very smart scientist that happened to be working with a project involving Memorizian (humanoid frog like) GELF Pheromone sweat which had a side effect that would turn the males into females when under stress of not being able to mate. The research was also used to help stabilize some life forms that lacked either female or male species. As it turned out Memorizian GELFs were sort of a transgender race in that they could switch genders depending on the environment to continue the lifespan of their race on a harsh planet. The Pheromone sweat they excreted would cause their body to switch genders when under stress. However known only to scientist, the Memorizian GELF Pheromone sweat has been known to affect some other male races as well. Although the Memorizian DNA was not available Franky believed he could either find it somewhere or find a substitute to do the same. Jaxx took a break from his training to see what his master was up to. As he walked into the main room with the lab equipment he saw Franky dancing like a high school girl as he was doing his calculations on a data pad.

Franky looking Stylish

Franky’s Jam
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIgZ7gMze7A&list=RDpIgZ7gMze7A#t=1

It was a disturbing site like that of the movie “The Bird Cage” that Eve made Jaxx watch on one of her movie nights. After the song was over Franky greeted his apprentice and shared a quite meal as he told him of his need for more research and equipment. While running the scanners they find a space station along the way, which happen to be the one Evelina visited long ago. Franky and Jaxx end up taking a detour to the space station.

After a long trek to their destination Franky hails the space station only to be slightly annoyed by the long delay in the response. The race of Iguanas (humans evolved from Iguanas with bug eyes and Iguana behavior) who occupy the station eventually agree to let them dock for a trade. As Jaxx and Franky exit the Starbug they find place reeks of garbage and some kind of odd burning incense that slightly resembled Jacky's old room. Franky wastes no time with his negotiations with the Iguanas. Of course this proves to be taxing for Franky since the iguanas are both slow to respond and indecisive. The best comparison would be negotiating with a stoned group of bug eyed humans. Franky takes advantage of the situation and ends up tricking the Iguanas into a game for access to the lab and some food. After the negotiations Franky takes Jaxx aside and hands him a large white antacid as he talks to him telepathically.

Franky said, “Oceans to Murgatroyd, my dear apprentice the negotiations are a success even. Now be a good boy and take this industrial strength antacid. Before the contest.”

Jaxx thought, “Huh? Wut contest?”

The Master thought, “Well I thought it was unfair to do all the work myself even, so I volunteered you to challenge the leader to a test of mettle even.”

He said, “Like you want me to fight him master?”

The Master answered, “No silly boy. Despite their raggedy appearance they seem to be somewhat civilized even. The challenge I put you in is a mega hot scorpion pepper eating contest.”

He looked at the antacid as reality kicked in and thought, “Why me?”

His mentor merely chuckled as he patted him on the back and thought, “Don’t sweat it even, it is all part of your training dear boy.”

Jaxx looked at Franky with concern as to why he has to endure this harsh treatment as he ate his antacid and walked to where the others were gathering. There he met a big iguana named Blu who was pompous and looking up at him. Blue was about as big as Jaxx with dark skin, black dreads, big bug eyes and colorful Rasta clothes. He looked at the table full of trays of the mega hot scorpion peppers and back at his opponent. According to the rules this was a no time limit contest to see who could eat the most peppers as both contestants get an official pepper counter. So basically if you pass out or die you lose. As they begin the contest both contestants begin taking turns eating the hot peppers. The contest went on for an hour as they took turns eating their peppers hoping the other will give up soon. Jaxx was sweating like he was in a spa while Blu was turning bright red.

A few Iguana's shout, "Blu your my boy!" in the background to cheer him on.

Finally both contestants were slowing down as each additional pepper was hurting them beyond imagination. The look of concern on Blu’s face showed he was passed his known limit. On the two hundredth and second pepper Jaxx painfully ate it as he agonized in sweating pain. Then Blu held up his two hundredth and second pepper and looked at it with a glaze of despair before he put it in his mouth and chewed it. Blue painfully swallowed it and pompously smiled at Jaxx for a moment to show his resolve, just before his stomach began melting and he keeled over on the floor dead. After the shock of losing Blu the Iguanas declare Jaxx the winner and allow him to claim his prize while they mourn the loss of Blu and rifle through his pockets. Franky helps his apprentice up and helps him walk to the labs on the other side of the station while the Iguanas say their good byes to Blu.

After they arrive at the labs Franky accesses a computer and checks the inventory while Jaxx holds his stomach in pain. After a quick assessment Franky looks in the cabinets and mixes up a few chemicals in a beaker and hands it to his sickly apprentice and says, “Drinks this dear boy. It will ease the pain a bit.”

Jaxx manages to guzzle the white foamy drink (Super Industrial antacid) down leaving him with a frosty white moustache. As he waits for a few minutes he feels the pain subside as it become more tolerable for him. He then finds himself able to walk normally again. He then walks up to his master who is prepping a hover sled to carry his winnings. It doesn’t take long before they are loading barrels and boxes of chemicals onto the sled as well as some equipment. Then Franky checks the computers again to see if he missed anything on his list. Meanwhile Jaxx got curious and looked around the rather large lab and found one of the side rooms. As he was checking out all the fancy old machines he a sharp pain in his gut as he staggered for a bit. After spewing out the remaining peppers in whit foamy broth to the side of a machine he managed to calm down. While trying to hold himself up he leaned on the computer panel of machine and accidently and unknowingly touched a few buttons on it.

He muttered, “Aww man I totally got the burning bubbles.”

As he felt the burning gas leave his backside he felt relieved. Once the pain subsided he noticed a light in his face as he looked up to see he was being stared at by a woman in a stasis chamber while the light seemed to be scanning him.

As he stared at the striking woman he heard the digital voice on the computer panel say, “Access granted. Initialing imprint stage. Please hold still for imprinting. He was confused as he pondered what “Imprint” meant. However before he could make sense of the situation the stasis chamber opened and the female looked directly at him and smiled.

The sultry female stepped out as the computer panel confirmed, “Imprinting completed. Congratulations you are now the owner of Project Sandy Bottoms. Sandy is a hybrid of a cluster worm and a human. She has been programmed to be a loyal bodyguard and love slave to the person she is imprinted on. For additional instruction please take the data pad below.”

He took the data pad as the machine pushed it out towards him. Sandy bowed to him and said, “I am yours to command master.”

He muttered, “Oh no, wut did I do?”

It didn’t take long before Franky found him and saw his situation. Jaxx was worried but Franky ordered him to practice his diplomacy skills with Sandy to amuse him. Shortly after all three looted the labs and head back to the Starbug with most of the supplies they were searching for. They were expecting the iguanas to stop them from taking the supplies only to find they all seemed paralyzed by the strange incense they were inhaling with water pipes. Then they walked past all the stoned Iguanas and dragged the hover sled to the Starbug. Franky got an idea while they are on the Starbug and suggests Sandy become a Calamar apprentice as well. Jaxx was not too pleased by this but lacked the courage to stand up to Franky. After Sandy agrees to become a Calamar Monk Apprentice, Franky implants her lessons psychically. So as they continue their trip Franky works on his Calamar body while Jaxx and Sandy work on their Calamar training when she is not trying to seduce Jaxx against his will.

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