Bruno "A rat in a maze"

Who: Bruno Downing, former IT Technician on the SS Oregon
Where: White Midget, about 3 light years away from Fernandos
When: A few hours before contact

Bruno was, wel he was doing the same thing he did every day. Make the journey between Polaris IV South to Polaris IV North, with a container onboard. As he landed, and the AI picked the cargo out of his ship with it's giant hydraulic fingers, he waddled along the flight deck to the giant screen, holding his stomach.
“Toilet?” He said. The AI nodded and he ran to the bathroom. He checked his bogie-encrusted watch and waited for the second hand to reach the top.

Poo time.

He left the bathroom and headed back to the AI, where a nutrigrain bar was waiting for him. He bit his lip. “Is there.... is there anything else I could eat?” He said nervously. “I mean... you've given me Nutrigrain bars for well...” he checked his watch “...3 years now, and it'd be nice to eat something else”
“Your next payment will be made after another successful cargo retrieval from Serraco Polaris IV North. Goodbye pilot Downing.” was all the AI said.
“Not even a bit of fruit maybe? No, no, obviously not. Or maybe just a fray bentos or something? I heard those last forever if correctly stored.”
“Your next payment will be made after another successful cargo retrieval from Serraco Polaris IV North. Goodbye pilot Downing.” said the computer.
“Oh. Well thanks” he said and walked back to his craft.

He could just hear the sound of voices coming from the craft.
"Hello? Mr. Downing? This is Dr. Pritchard again, could I trouble you for a lift?"

Bruno bit his lip. He wondered if the AI had heard that. He turned to look at the giant pixellated eye on the computer screen. Had it heard?
“Pilot Downing. We remind you that if you do not complete you mission you will not get payment.” was all the computer said. “No distractions either.”
Bruno winced.
“Yes.” He sighed. “Yes of course.” Then did a sad salute.

It was a simple warning. One that Bruno knew the cold computer meant. He was trapped like a rat in a maze, and the only way he could survive was to play the game.

He got in his ship and piloted it away from the station, setting his course for the other station to pick up more cargo.

“Check space background radiation” check. He said, ticking off his hourly todo list.
“Check cockpit lights work” he turned the lights on and off. Although not satisfied, he turned them on an off again a further 7 times. Then had to continue to 10 just to end on a round number.

He then swivelled his cockpit to the radio. “Good morning outer space. Today I've cancelled my morning talk hour, as the those crazy (I mean lovely) robots have seem to think I'm getting too 'distracted' from my mission. So here's 2 hours non-stop of Chris Rea, because we really are on the road to hell.”

He sat back and relaxed. Which is when something odd happened.

A light on his radio blinked. He checked his watch, and when the second hand was at the top, he faded out the music and tentatively took the call. “It appears we have a listener on line 1. I did say though that talk time today was cancelled.”
“Hello Bruno. Long time listener, first time caller.” Said an ominous voice that sounded like it had too many teeth in its mouth.
Bruno was immediately nervous. This wasn't the far-away voice of Pritchard who asked him for help last week, this voice was clear and confident.

“I... I... where are you calling from listener?”
There was silence.
“I'm calling from the cargo bay”
Bruno let out a panicked squeak. Then immediately slammed his headphones down on the dash, and ran out of the cockpit to the cargobay. He didn't even stop to look at his watch.

Jogging down there, he stopped in the cargo bay, wheezing. It was totally empty.

He trudged back up to the cockpit where the light was blinking again.
“Did you cut me off?” The voice asked.
“Yes, sorry, it... er... was time for the travel news.”
“What travel news?”
“Time for the travel news. The spaceway between Serraco Polaris IV northbound is mostly clear today but there is a risk of an asteroid shower which may slow travel times.”
“You've never done travel news before.” Said the voice.
“So what's your name caller?” Bruno asked.
“Call me General, General Von Hare.”
“Okay, nice to talk to you General.” Bruno lied. “Are you calling to request a song? I could play you some Simon Le Bon?”
“Don't you ever get tired of doing the same thing over and over?” Said Von Hare. “Same thing every day, working for the man.”
Bruno said nothing, and was worried the computers at the Serraco spacestations listened in. If they did they certainly never called in.
“And the cargo, haven't you ever wondered what's inside those giant boxes?”
“I... I... it's none of my business. They give me a job to do, I get payment...”
“Pfft... you call 1 nutrigrain bar payment?”
“It keeps me alive...” He didn't mention the crippling diarrhoea it gave him.
“You know what I think?” Said Von Hare.
“Not really, and we're out of time. How about you call in on Thursday for 'the big topic' where we debate the issues of the day and we'll discuss it then?”
“Your issues of the day are mundane pap. The best type of sausage? Which Canadian animal makes the best noise? Which car would Henry VIII drive?”
Bruno bit his lip. “Those were the best chats of the year!”
“It's all a distraction Bruno. You're distracting yourself from what needs to be done.”
“What needs to be done?”
“You can't do this for your entire life. Trapped between two spacestations. A slave to two computers. How do you even know there's anything in those crates to carry across the solar system? They could be empty!”
“I'm sure it's essential supplies.” said Bruno.
“Computers don't need supplies.” Said the voice.
There was a pause, as Bruno thought about it. “What else should I be doing?”
“You've got a spaceship. You could do ANYTHING”
“Well there was some people who needed rescuing... I've been feeling a bit guilty about that.”
“Exactly!” Said Von Hare. “Go rescue them. Be a hero!”
“But...”
“Yes?”
“But... what if they come aboard and start messing up the place? I have a very strict schedule to keep.”

Behind him, the cockpit door opened and closed automatically. Bruno immediately spun around.
“Where are you? Are you on my ship?”
The co-pilot's seat next to him spun, then groaned as if someone had sat down. Bruno leaped up, what's happening?!”
“Relax.” Said the voice through the radio. “You can't see me. You can only hear me through the radio.”
Bruno was terrified. He took the headphones off and threw them on the dashboard. Then just stared at the chair which was rocking slightly.
Eventually he picked the headphones back up. “What are you? Why are you invisible?”
“It's a long story. I'll tell you one day, but let's just say I've got larger ears than you imagine. Remember the Oregon?”
“With the ...rabbits?”
Von Hare didn't say anything, but the chair rocked harder, possibly indicating he was nodding his head.
“You're a rabbit?”
“It's been 3 million years. I read all about you though. Liberating the rabbits on the Oregon, well done.”
“An invisible rabbit?” Said Bruno. Then mulled that over. “Listen, this is absurd.” he said. “It's only 11:30 and I've only played 2 songs.”
“Haven't you got some Humans to rescue?”
“I... I... can't.”
“I think you'll have to.”
“Why?”
“Because they're coming right at us.”
Bruno looked at the background radiation light, which was blinking like a Christmas tree.
“Smeg!”
Outside, a Human in spacesuit was coming right at them.

<snip>
Jay disconnected his oxygen tank, yanked off the valve and a jet of air surged out, pushing him upwards into Brunos path.
The alert sounded, he was nearly out of air. If he could just….
*smack*
Bruno was startled when his cockpit glass was suddenly obscured by a grinning maniac. Flat across the viewport. 
Jay lifted himself off the glass slightly and waved at Bruno.
Bruno waved back.
<end snip>

“What do I do?”
“Let him in.” Said the invisible rabbit.
“I... I... ok” Bruno's finger hovered over the button to open the cargo bay and allow him inside. First though, he checked his watch. He'd just missed the minute mark, so would have to wait another 45 seconds.
“I think he's choking to death.” Said Von Hare.
“Just wait a minute...” Bruno looked at his watch.
“What are you doing?”
“I have to wait until the second hands gets to the top.”
“Why?”
“Because I do! It's.... a thing that I do.”
“It's ridiculous.”
“Says the invisible talking rabbit?!” Bruno shouted back.
“He's still choking to death. I think he's out of air.”
“Just 30 more seconds.”
“Pretty sure he can't last 30 more seconds.”
“Oh smeg it.” Bruno slammed his hand down on the button. The cargo bay door opened from the outside and a soft grapple fired out, and dragged him inside.

“Ohmigod, ohmigod, ohmigod!” Bruno paced around the cockpit. “I've done it. Someone's onboard. I don't know who he is? What if he's a murderer, or a hijacker?”
“What if I'm a murderer and a hijacker?” Said Von Hare.
“Yikes.” Said Bruno, and hid under his chair. “Also, more importantly, what music should I play him? Cliff Richard or Simon Le Bon?”

<Tag Jay! Welcome aboard. You'll find Bruno cowering in the cockpit>