I-scare-iot. Get it? It's a pun. [FPF]

Before I'd known what had happened, there was a flash, and then I was lying down in some dirt. Still on Earth, I thought.

I wasn't sure why I was disappointed.

I sat up. Looked around a bit. There was a town nearby. An old one, at that.

Oh god, I thought. An old one. I'm sick of the past. We never hang out in the future. Always the past, or some dirty swamp planets, or a rusty old ship unrelated to our rusty old ship. Well, no good comes from sitting around. Better go check it out. Try and find the others again.

Would it compromise history to start singing a Queen song?... Yes. But Barcelona is absolutely worth it. How else will I pass the time?

"Barcelooona..." I started.

"What's Barcelona?" someone behind me said.

"Jesus H. Christ!" I shrieked.

"No, sorry. My name is Judas. I'm afraid you've just missed Jesus."

"Wait, wha-?" I said. "Oh... Oh. Oh shit."