Artemis and Boyd's Excellent Las Vegas Adventure Part 1

Artemis liked the Shops at Crystal, it reminded him of the promenade on the Guild of Science flagship the GSDSS-Eternity. The Eternity is where the Guild held its annual Christmas ball, where all the greatest scientists would go to brag and show off, get absolutely plastered on top shelf liquor, and sing karaoke. Not too different from Las Vegas really, only the drunks could afford a fleet a limos to take them home instead of a measly cab.

Artemis had ditched the NASA work attire and bought himself a Hawaiian shirt adorned with parrots and flowers, khakis, and white loafers. A nice changed of pace, and it would help him fit in a little better than running around with NASA written all over him. Once his attire was purchased Artemis went to a nearby bar to wait for any Dwarfers that might have seen his message. 3037 LAS VEGAS BOULEVARD SOUTH LAS VEGAS THE SHOPS AT CRYSTAL ARTEMIS. It couldn't have been more clear if Artemis shot off fireworks from the roof. But as time passed and nobody showed up, Artemis began to wonder, who watches the news except lonely people and psychos looking for a conspiracy to blog about? "Shit" Artemis whispered, realizing that the Dwarfers probably hadn't seen his message.

"Another drink sir?" the bartender asked. "Uh...yes. A Greyhound, and go easy on the damn ice. I want a cocktail, not a watered down mess" Artemis replied, angry with the extremely watery cocktail he was served earlier. The bartender plopped the drink down in front of Artemis. "Hi..." Artemis jumped out of his skin. He turned to see Boyd sitting next to him, dressed like Elvis. "Boy?" "Boyd...it's...Boyd" "How did you find me?" "I saw your message on the news while I was trying to find...the corporation...where is everybody else?" Artemis shook his head. "I'm wondering that myself. We all have to be in Las Vegas, I highly doubt that Mr. Chrysler or Mrs. Jones would make a time jump without thoroughly calculating our destination" Boyd nodded. The bartender came by. "Hello...." she snickered. "...Elvis, what can I get you?" Boyd cleared his throat, and in a perfect Elvis impression said "Can you get me a fuzzy naval baby?" The bartender laughed, nodded, and went to get Boyd's drink.

"Whoa, that was...wow" Artemis commented. "I've learned to do many voices, I have to be in disguise alot to avoid the corporation" Boyd replied. Artemis nodded, took a sip of his still watered down drink, and looked to the television. He watched the sports coverage, and wondered what year Giraffe Basketball would finally come around. Artemis had season tickets for the New York Necks, and meant to use them on his next shore leave (he would be frozen and cast into the distant future before he could use them).

"....and its another terrible defeat for the team, this being their fifth loss this season. Now we'll move on to local sporting news. It was pandemonium at the Battle Bots tournament..." Artemis thought he saw something. He scanned the video, and saw a Skutter in the ring. Not just any Skutter...."Mr. Boyd, it's Mr. Jaxx!" Artemis said, pointing at the television. "Okay?" Boyd said, not knowing what else to say. "You! Bar wench, where is this tournament held? Answer me!" "The Emperor's Palace you shit ass!" The bartender, fed up with Artemis' verbal abuse, replied. "Thank you! Now go back to being sad..." Artemis stood up and walked out, dragging Boyd and his weird drink out with him.

Out in front of City Center was a limo, the driver was holding a sign that read "Weathers". "Wow Boyd, you have a limo?" Artemis said. "Yeah, I kinda got a little money. My grandpa was an executive for GE, and he got a huge settlement after being hit by a bicycle courier and getting his ride stolen, both in Las Vegas" Artemis nodded, and joined Boyd in the limo. As the limo pulled away, Boyd's grandfather charged out of City Center and tried to stop the limo. "What the hell? I paid a lot of money for that you bastards!" He yelled. He was then hit by a bicycle courier....

(some cruising the strip music http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FnH_zwVmiuE)

Artemis and Boyd gawked at the strip from the best point of view: a limo. "Wow, of all the things on bucket list I thought this would never be the one I got to fufill!" Artemis said cheerfully, examining a bottle of champagne. "Really?" Asked Boyd. "Yeah, I already hunted an ice yeti and climbed Mount Everest. I think that Everest was the easiest, it was never the same after they put that escalator in" Replied Artemis. "Gentlemen, the Emperor's Palace, correct?" The driver asked. "Uh...yeah" Replied Boyd. "Okay, I'll have Phelps call the casino to make arrangements" "Wait...what?" "What? Tom didn't tell you at the airport? We're comping the vacation, the raffle at the company picnic remember?" Boyd and Artemis looked at each other. Seconds later Boyd was hanging out the window, a bottle of whisky in his hands, throwing tiny umbrellas at pedestrians. Artemis was in the sun roof with the bottle of champagne. "I'm here baby! Wooooo!" Boyd shouted. "This is sooooo excelleeeent! Oh, Boyd, remind me to pick up a disposable camera from the gift shop. The Missus will be quite irate if I don't take pictures!" Boyd gave Artemis a thumbs up and took a swig from the whisky. The men hooted and hollered as the limo cruised down the strip.

<snip>
Skutter Jaxx, Evelina and Jacky enjoyed their free meal and decided to go walking down the strip to see if they could find the others. As they did Evelina was in awe as she explained to Skutter Jaxx what they were looking at. Jacky did his best to avoid the crowds and keep to himself. They walked for over an hour with no luck on finding the others.
<snip/>

There was a commotion out on the street. Jaxx, Jacky, and Evelina went to the curb to see two drunken idiots partying in a limo, spraying an excitement drunk crowd with champagne. "Look at those morons, Eve babe" Jaxx commented. "Wait...that's Artemis and Boyd!" Jacky said. As the limo passed, Artie and Boyd sprayed the trio with champagne, not recognizing them. The limo continued down another block and turned into the Emperor's Palace. "Should we go after them?" Evelina asked Jacky and Jaxx.

inside the casino

"Welcome to the Emperor's Palace Mr. Weathers, and....Mr. Weathers' Plus One" The host said. "We have received payment, and are happy to welcome you to our humble casino! We would be honored if you were to join us at the soiree tonight in the penthouse" Boyd shrugged. "Uh...sure" The men were lead to a "vip" elevator.

In the penthouse

Artemis and Boyd entered the penthouse, and after checking in, entered the party. "Ladies and gentlemen" the announcer began "Mr. Charles Emerson Weathers of General Electric, and..." Artemis whispered in the announcer's ear. "Mr. Karl. A. Richmount, the owner of the New York Necks Giraffe Basketball team" Artemis and Boyd were applauded as they descended the stairs into the party.

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