Dysart- 'Back again'

Who: Dysart, Captain Jay
Where: Blue Dwarf
When: First day back
Return; day 1.
A single man, dressed in a pure white officer's uniform weaved
thorough the uncharacteristically crowded corridors of the JMC mining
vessel Blue Dwarf. Although he apparently wore simple plastic boots
the distinct clank of metal-on-metal allowed anyone within a meter of
him to give him an distinct look.
Of all things he expected when when Dysart returned to the Blue Dwarf,
he wasn't expecting how much it had changed. Jed was dead. Over 500
new crew members had joined since an effort to replace the massive
body count. Andy Roos was gone. Last but not least, pretty much all of
the ship- inside and out- had been painted over to conceal the alcohol
and bug guts stains.
Then again, the last one happened practically every week.
At the moment Dysart was on his way to the Captain's quarters for a
non-standard briefing. He wasn't looking forward to it. Then again, if
he had a choice in the matter he would still be on the Pink Dwarf
getting pity dates from some of the nurses.
In a way he hated those girls but at the time he was just too lonely
to care.
Regardless he was surprised at the speed in which we was brought back
online. Lester was instrumental in keeping him alive. Although it was
true that Lester was by part responsible for some of the damages
incurred (so much so that one of the German engineers actively cried
out of his blood... with a frostmorune replica), the AI tech also
provided various ways in which to improve his subsystems.
SNIDE's suggestions, especially the more 'outspoken' (read: phallic),
where ignored for obvious reasons. The location of said improvement
also tipped Dysart off to the fact that SNIDE had full intentions that
the little jaunt through the Thorax wasn't going to be the last.
Still, it wasn't to say that Dysart was surprised with this outcome.
The JMC, to their credit, was pretty straightforward with what they
wanted. A spy. He wasn't even sure what they wanted over than to
'stick around'. The AI wasn't stupid however, he had little doubt
they'd riddled his new (but barely changed) new frame with so many
kinds of wonderful spyware that if he wasn't an Orphan his code name
would be 'big brother'.
With a single metal rap of his knuckles on the door of the captain's
quarters, Dysart stood still and waited slightly anxious at the reply.
"Enter." A somewhat hoarse voice filtered through the side speakers. A
single air hiss and door pulled itself up into the ceiling. Dysart
immediately strolled through the breech and gave Captain Chrysler a
single stiff Salute.
"Lieutenant Armend Dysart reporting for duty."
The sudden captaincy had taken it's toll on the current/former/future
war hero. Jay's weary eyes rolled up at the crisply dressed robot from
behind two towers of paperwork. He peered almost crowlike at Dysart's
chest. "Ensign Dysart, actually" Captain Chrysler corrected before
stamping the next sheet robotically.
"Right...erm..." Dysart coughed nervously. Naturally he couldn't be
allowed to keep his self-designated 'rank'. Back to the present; Jay
had been on the ship long before Andy had arrived. The AI had no
memory of what he was like, he could be an Axe crazy, tap dancing
cross dresser for all Dysart knew.
"Obviously. I understand you were stationed at Pink Dwarf before the
fact... Under the command of an old acquaintance of mine. A hologram
now too as I understand." Jay, despite his words, did his best to
ignore the construct in front of him.
"That's correct, sir." Dysart nodded, he could vividly remember the
panty-runs he joined his previous 'captain' on.
"Your history has been a little more... colourful, or that is to say,
colourless." At this, Jay finally stopped.
"Sir?" The side of Dysart's mouth twitched.
With practiced ease the tired captain plucked out a single sheet of
paper and held up above his desk. "Your background check came up
rather lacking. No birthplace other than 'Australia', no mention of
any academy I know of. And no, I don't care how long the damn name is
the 'quantum degree of ultimate IT knowledge' is not officially
recognised in the JMC officer's resume."
The captain stood up slowly, he stretched lazy sending several bones
cracking up and down his body. "In a nutshell, there is a snowball's
chance hell that I'd let you on my ship any longer than I'd have to."
"...That's what I thought." With that, Dysart turned from the captain.
Only a few steps away from the door and yet already a small smirk grew
on his face.
"However-!." Jay slapped a button beside his desk, sending the door
slamming shut. The AI stopped abruptly at the shut door, his head
turning slowly. "...Yes?"
Out of the opposite pile, Jay pulled out a sheet in the same manner as
though he would pull out a table cloth. "-However... This little piece
of paper however, tells me otherwise. As the Blue Dwarf is pretty much
a dumping ground for anything as well as the universe's biggest target
for all kinds of bastards... turns out we're also the best testing
ground. I don't have a choice, you've been transfered."
At this Dysart's face fell sightly. "I see... well I guess I'll set
myself up in the Information and Technology hub." Once more he
attempted to turn away only to find that the door behind him had yet
to shift.
"Eh heh heh heh... I don't think so." With an airy whoop Jay collapsed
back into his chair.
"*What*?" The captain's grin only grew at the response.
"I HAVE to take you, it didn't say WHAT I had to take you AS."
"...Oh my God... please don't let it be."
"Turns out... we're a man short of a 120 man contingent of Janitors
and cleaners alike. YOU just joined them, the proud, the few."
"Why God, why... wait a minute... my frame isn't water tight, I can't-!"
"-I *know*." Like a bear trap slamming shut Jay's face exploded into a
grin that oozed with a bloody 'take that' to the JMC. The Captain
smoothly shifted the roster sheet forward with his index finger.
"Here's your bunk deck, your roster, oh and the Skutters you'll be
working with."
"What was that...?" Dysart's face recoiled as though the captain had
just slapped him.
"Oh yeah..." Jay mentioned off-handedly, picking the sheet up again.
"We'd lost our Skutters a while back. We also got a slightly smaller
unit of PeeWees, about 1 to every 5 Skutters. They ought to make your
jobs a bit easi-."
Within the blink of an eye the captain found the sheet torn from his
paper. Snapping up at the ensign he only got a flimsy apologetic smile
before Dysart stabbed the door switch, turned and half sprinted out of
the office.
A small grin re-asserted itself across Jay's face before he returned
to the unconquerable sheets. "Spies in plain sight... JMC high command
are anything if not consistent."
<Dysart has returned and now so has his job>