Press Release

Who: Jonathan Carnoofal
Where: JMC Press office, Titan
When: Now
Jonathan Carnoofal was the Public Relations guy for the entire
Jupiter Mining Corporation.
There hadn't been many times when the Jupiter Mining Corporation had
needed to speak directly to the press, only in times when the press
had nothing better to do and concocted scandals or conspiracies, like
the rumoured involvement of the JMC in the assassination of Cliff
Richard, or the involvement in the fast food wars, or the theory that
the JMC had been using prisoners in stasis booths to transport alien
technology disguised as internal organs.
But today Jonathan was needed. The largest and most read newspaper in
the galaxy, "The Daily Suns" (famed only for it's page-3 lovely which
normally had just more than the right amount of nipples) had grabbed
hold of the fact that the Blue Dwarf's captain had green blood and
possibly wasn't human.
Hundreds of journalists hounded the JMC's press office on Titan.
Jonathan had to squeeze past them all to get back from his lunch
break. As he entered the building, he slammed the door behind him,
and straightened his suit, only to find that it had been ripped
several in places by the hounding mob outside.
His boss met him immediately and shook him by the shoulders. "They
are ripping us to pieces Jonathan, the JMC is ruined!"
"Don't worry Bob, don't worry! I'll think of something."
"You better do. It's saying we employ dangerous blood sucking aliens
as our starship captains."
"Do we?"
"They're saying that Jed Calvert is an alien, and it was only time
before he used the Blue Dwarf as a weapon against all of Humanity!"
"Oh that's just silly."
"Is it? Is it really? He's been incredibly unreliable lately. He
defied the entire Space Corps for the entire Christmas period, do you
not remember that? He almost turned his back on the JMC!"
"Everything worked out fine though, and I'll handle this, don't
worry." Jonathan smiled a warm and confident smile, letting his boss
know that this was something he could handle. "I'll go and talk to
the press and tell them everything is fine. Jed Calvert is human, we
have his birth records and early blood records to prove it."
Bob nodded.
Jonathan turned away, ready to go do his work, but after a moment he
turned back. "I need t oknow though... is Calvert human?"
Bob shrugged. "We don't know."
"Where is he?"
"In some sort of hospital, owned by a company called TransMed
Pharmaceuticals. I tried ringing them up, but they wouldn't let me
have any information about him at all."
"Sounds suspicious." Said Jonathan, and then just shruged and went to
talk to the large crown of journalists outside.