(no subject)

Jay stumbled slightly as he walked down the corridor, balancing 4 large cardboard boxes on top of the other in his arms. He steadied himself by leaning against the corridor wall."CAREFUL!" Katrina scolded, "There's things in those boxes that are delicate! That my grandmother gave!! I'd hate them to get broken!, Come on Jay it's not like I've struggled to carry anything!"Jay peered around the stack ox boxes to glare at his girlfriend. She clutched a single, small box full of candles."No..." He replied "No you haven't struggled..might that be something to do with the fact that you've barely carried a SMEGGING THING?!"Katrina raised an eyebrow, "Well, if you want to take that tone, we can just forget about me moving in and you can carry my stuff back to my quarters!"Jay muttered something to himself, after seriously considering her suggestion, but he hadn't spent his entire day off lugging box after box of girly tat up three decks and along almost the entire length of the 'Dwarf to take it from Katrina's old quarters to his, in the senior officers habitation decks."Let's just get it finished" he muttered, "I promised Phil I'd meet him in Parrotts later for a pint, the guy need's his mates round him at the moment...""You're not going to help me unpack?""The guy's just become a widower. And I think as both his best friend and, his only friend who has gone through the same thing I can't ignore him at the moment, you can understand that can't you?"Katrina nodded, she could  understand it, and Phil had been there for Jay when Alota had died, it was the least he could do, even if she did find it hard whenever Jay mentioned Alota, he loved Katrina, sure, and she knew this, but he was also never going to stop loving Alota just as much, and tonight, comforting Phil was going to bring her memory to the fore for Jay, which meant he'd be drunker than usual when he got home and in a bad mood.
They entered Jay's quarters, and Jay placed the boxes as carefully as he could on the floor, near the other stacks that he'd placed there earlier. "How do you have so much stuff?" he asked, surveying the enourmous piles of boxes, suitcases and other such containers. Jay didn't know why he asked that, it was a proven scientific fact, as of about 20 years ago, when a project was undertaken by a male scientist to solve the mysteries of the female human that had plagued mankind for centuries,  that women had a bizarre genetic ability, which allowed them to bend time and space.
On one hand, this ability meant that they were able to make time pass quickly for themselves, for example, whenever a woman makes the comment that she'll be ready in five minutes, she actually entered a kind of sub-level of time where time, to her, and her female friends passed in exactly, five minutes, but to everyone outside of this sub-level, usually the man waiting for her, the time that passed would be more like an hour and a half.
This ability also led to the woman nearly always being late.
On the other hand, this ability had some advantages to men, which Jay knew was especially prudent in this situation, truth be told, Jay's quarters were bigger than Katrinas, yet, always seemed smaller, and more cluttered, despite his containing less furniture and belongings, Katrinas was full of furniture, cushions, and general tat, at least twice as much as Jay had in his,yet her smaller quarters always seemed enormous and far less cluttered. This was due to the womans ability to bend the laws of physics and fit more mass into smaller spaces, Jay knew that when he returned from Parrots, his quarters, despite being full of more femenine nonsense, would seem twice the size.
Same was true of packing suitcases for holiday, Jay's was always stuffed to the brim barely closeable, yet Katrina would always have a perfectly sealed case, all sides flat, upon opening there would be plenty of space for more stuff, yet when it was emptied, she'd had ten times more stuff packed than Jay, who'd usually forgotten to pack a change of underwear, which meant he'd have to buy some on whatever planet they'd chosen to visit, and then not have room for them in his suitcase home.
Scientists had named this discovery the "Mary Poppins gene"
Jay shrugged, grabbed his keys, kissed Katrina and headed out to meet Phil.
On his way, he passed the quarters that had been assigned to his clone, Jayne. She'd not left them once. Jay mulled something over for a second, then rang the doorbell."come in.." came Jayne's voice, meekly through the door. Jay did so."Hey." He said "How's things?""Terrible..." Jayne said, frankly, "I helped save the ship, but all I get when I see people is accusing stares, whispers behind my back...""I know the feeling" Jay said "After the incident when I was possessed by my evil counterpart and destroyed the earth. People KNEW the truth, but it took along time for people to trust me again, even after Tara and I...." he stopped for a second as he remembered Tara, he was saddened by her death more than by most, she was his late wife's best friend, and he and Tara were very close, he continued his sentence  "sent the ship back in time to restore our homeworld. I couldn't save ALL the planets I destroyed, Plebe, New Ibiza, The Aeron and Eniram homeworld, all gone. It took a long time, but people came round, and they will with you." "This is different, I've tried to take over this ship twice now, I'm responible for a lot of deaths....""Hello....three planets and the Earth......not to mention all the Space Corp ships I destroyed, soon they'll realise that you helped SAVE the ship.""Maybe..""Look, why don't I make you an offer?""Oh?""Yeah, I can give you the opportunity to help prove yourself, you have my flying skills, just needs a little trianing to sharpen it up, I can give you a job, in my department, you'll train as a cadet, and serve active duty as with every other crew member, pretty soon you'll have their respect.""What about Amber? She's your deputy, and thanks to me, her mother dead.""Well, I'll explain what really happened, it wasn't your fault, you were mislead. Besides, she's done stuff she'd not proud of too, during the Hymenopteran war, she joined me, on their side, it was her who killed my wife.""Really?""Yeah, but she like me, she wasn't herself, though don't be fooled, Amber's....fiesty....and stubborn, she won't make it easy for you, she WILL blame you, at least to begin with, but trust me, she's not as tough as she makes out to be, she'll come round" "Ok..I'll...I'll do it!""Welcome aboard cadet..."
 
<tag, Becca, if you fancy some conflict at work, feel free to tag away, perhaps with Rufus too, poor kid...'specially when he finds out Vanessa's secret!>
 
Oh, and also, this is likely to be my last post for a couple of weeks, gonna be VERY busy this week, as on Saturday I get married!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Then, we go to Rome on honeymoon for a week!!!!
 
Peace out guys, stay frosty.