So . . . Who wants lunch?

Who: Barf and the Blue Dwarf Crew
Where: Halkon moon (when will we leave!)
When: After a strange pickle.
-------------------------
Barf woke up inside his ship, which was odd because he didn't remember going to bed.
"Dent," he yawned. "What did you do this time?"
"The smart thing, as always," Dent answered.
"I have no time for fun and games," Barf warned.
"We were being pulled be a tractor beam," Dent said. "So, I did what I do best to tractor
beams: I put this whole ship on sleep mode, making it invisible to the tractor beam."
"You can do that?"
"It's hard to explain specifics on how exactly it works," Dent said, "but yeah, I can do it and
I did."
Suddenly, Barf heard a knocking upon the metal of the door of his ship. Barf got up to
open the door. When he opened the door, he saw Rika who was a bit exhausted. "Hey
Rika," Barf greeted. "What's going on?"
Rika panted, "You. . . better have a good explanation for Efof before he gets here."
Barf put his pinky into his right ear and twisted it a bit, and then he asked, "What was that?
I thought you said I should be worried about Efof."
"Yes, he has a bit of rage today. His girlfriend."
"Say no more."
As soon as Barf came out of the ship, he saw Efof stomping toward him. "Barf!" Efof
yelled. "How did your ship not get tractor beamed?"
"Sleep mode?" Barf answered.
"What?"
"Ask him, not me," Barf said as he pointed to his ship.
"Who the hell are you, where's Barf?" Efof asked.
"Shapshifter gene," Rika answered. "He can't control it sometimes."
"Sometimes?" Barf begged to differ. "All the time. The only thing that doesn't change is
my height and width."
"Sorry," Efof apologized, slightly less steamed.
"Understandable," Barf said. "I don't get sensitive about that. I get more sensitive about
my knowledge of things. I really don't have book smarts. But that's not the point, you're
going through a lot man. We'll get her back."
"Took the words out of my mouth," Jay said. "I have somewhat of a plan to do this, but I
need your help."
"Sure," Barf agreed.
---------------
*Up in Orbit of the Halkon moon with Rika*
As Barf and Rika were waiting to find some sort of reading on Rosette or Fferna, Dent said,
"This should take a while, so two should play a card game or something. Oh, in fact, since
I'm bored as well-"
"I wouldn't finish that statement if I were you Dent," Barf warned his ship. "Rika's no girl to
mess with." Barf turned to Rika and said, "He likes to be perverted. I never bring anyone
on this ship for that particular reason."
Rika understood. Barf took out a deck of cards and they started playing Go Fish, then War,
then something else. Then Dent asked, "Why don't you ever give me porn to watch Barf?"
"Because it gives me a head ache." Just then, there was a laser blast heard. "What the hell
was that?"
"Oh, we're being chased by a Halkon ship."
"Why did I agree to this?" Rika asked.
They quickly went back to the safety seats as the ship shook, then Barf yelled, "How long
did you know there was a Halkon ship coming towards us."
"I'm the one who's bored," Dent complained.
"Don't start! just get us out of this mess," Barf demanded.
"Okay, I'll talk to them," Dent said.
"No!"
Just then, there was a Halkon talking, "Lower your weapons and surrender."
"Welcome to Kiss My Ass, how can I serve you," Dent's voice said.
Barf burried his face into his hand and shook it with embarassment. There was silence,
then Dent said, "I think they're charging their weapons."
"Why can't you turn him off?" Rika asked.
"We'll be more helpless than we are now, trust me," Barf answered.
"I don't know who's dumber, the manufacturer of this junk or you for buying it."
"It was a deal."
"Figures you'd be the one for cheap thrills."
"What's that suppose to mean?"
"Oh, come on Barf. Mountain Dew. Who drinks Mountain Dew as oppose to an alcoholic
beverage? And those girls on Mk9's ship. You were totally just settling with just looking
at them. You didn't even touch there three breasts."
"Guys," Dent said.
Barf ignored him and argued with Rika, "I happen to really lik Mountain Dew, and I'm afraid
of touching private parts."
"Guys."
"You sure liked playing the facade," Rika continued. "Acting like you were having a good
time. Yet you weren't. What's wrong with actually having a good time for you?"
"Guys."
Barf continued, "They looked at me funny. I saw exactly what they were thinking about
when they looked at me. I'm not in for causing trouble, so I do what I can to keep out of
it."
Silence, then Dent said again, "Guys."
"What?!" both Rika and Barf asked.
"I disabled the Halkon ship," Dent answered. "I was able to dodge them enough to take
their fule supply and tamper with their system. They're floating out into the black of space
now."
There was even more silence in the ship. Dent went back into orbit of the moon to try and
look for Rosette and Fferna. Barf and Rika were just exhausted about the panic they just
went through. "So," Dent said, ". . . who want's lunch?"