Actionette: Recapping Of The Ketos

Who: The Castle Team, and Charles Keto (Bot)
Where: The Castle Laboratory & Cells
When: Tuesdayish
============================
<<SNIP>>
"Welcome to my lab," hissed the robotic voice of Charles Keto, "I do
hope you will have a comfortable stay. Short, but comfortable."
<<END SNIP>>
"Buh..." managed Xavier Keto from within the cell, staring wide-eyed
at the robot containing the brain of his brother, "Buh..."
"I see my wonderful brother's wits are as sharp as ever they were,"
observed Charles Keto levelly from outside the cell, "And we have the
lovely Tara and the wonderful Mr Chrysler present as well, together
with one whom I believe is Christopher Harris and...hmm, and one
charming young lady who I don't appear to have had the pleasure of
meeting."
"Katrina," Katrina said briefly, looking confused, "And Jay, I'm a
little confused here."
"Ain't we all," nodded Jay, also staring at the Keto-bot beyond the
cell bars, "Didn't you die, or something?"
"Buh," Xavier Keto burbled again, raising one trembling hand to point
nonsensically at his machine-clad brother.
"My brother is correct, I assume," said the Keto-bot, turning on its
wheels and rolling back and forth in front of the cell for what was
presumably intended to be dramatic effect, "After my brother's brain
was returned to his somewhat flimsy body, it seems that everybody
considered me to be something less of a threat than when I
was...fleshy. I was stuck in a jar and, due to what I can only assume
was a clerical error, was stored away in the top shelf of a cleaning
supplies closet. Many months of reading the back of a Domestos bottle
allowed me to think up several rather creative ways to get my
revenge...most of them including bleach, tis true..."
"Revenge? On US!?" asked Tara incredulously, "Charlie, you tried to
blow up the Blue Dwarf! With all of us on it!"
"And if I were to stick your brain in a jar for years I suppose you
would be all butterflies and rainbows, hmm!?" snapped the Keto-bot,
waving one mechanical claw around in the air, "NOTHING will ever be
enough to make you pathetic people pay for what you have consigned me to!"
"Buh!"
"Shut up!" snarled the Keto-bot, "And so, gradually, I plotted. I
managed to persuade an errant skutter to get me out of that infernal
closet and back into a relatively primitive robotic shell. I fled the
Blue Dwarf and ended up here, on Mars. But here I found nobody took
me seriously either! It seems that being a brain in a jar, albeit a
mobile one, doesn't give one much in the way of rights. Did you know
that brains in jars can't even vote on Mars?!"
"Shocking," murmured Jay drily.
"I know!" exclaimed the Keto-bot, completely missing the sarcasm, "And
so I, enraged, came here, to this abandoned castle. And that, my
dear, dear crew, is where I began my wonderous work..."
The Keto-bot paused in its constant rolling back and forth, and then
turned. Despite the fact that it had no facial features at all, the
crewmembers in the cell got the distinct impression that it was
grinning evilly.
"And that," it hissed, "Is where you come in..."
The imprisoned crew glanced at each other nervously.
"You see," continued the Keto-bot, waving its scalpel menacingly as it
gestured to the laboratory behind it, strewn with zombies and human
remains, "I decided that in order to exact my revenge I needed a body.
ANY body. And so I started trying to work out how best to imbue
myself into such a shell.
Unfortunately, it turns out that it isn't nearly as easy as I had
thought. My brother and I were compatible, genetically, and so the
one in a million chance of our brains being exchanged played out
successfully. Given that the bodies I have been experimenting on are
NOT so compatible, it turns out that the exact chances are..."
The Keto-bot paused and turned to look out over its laboratory,
murmuring something to itself, appearing to be counting quietly. The
crewmembers looked at each other again, looking rather more worried
with the exception of Xavier Keto, who managed a subdued 'buh?'
"...well," said the Keto-bot, turning back to face them, "Let's just
say that the current success rate is a grand total of zero out of
fifty-seven thousand, four hundred and sixty three."
"Jay," murmured Katrina, "Did the creepy robot guy just imply that
there are over fifty thousand zombies on Mars?"
"Yes," replied Jay, quietly nodding, "Yes, I think he did."
"The rest of the crew are facing fifty thousand zombies in that
quarry? Isn't that cause for concern?"
"Only for the zombies," replied Jay, still whispering as he kept his
eyes on the Keto-bot, which was now rolling back and forth again,
"They've got Phil to contend with."
"Ah."
======================
OOC: Tag anybody. Yes, this is mostly a recap of background history
for all those who don't know it. Our Keto (Xavier Keto) has a twin
brother (Charles Keto), whose brain he kept in a jar to help him
achieve his medical qualifications. For obvious reasons, this didn't
sit well with the brain, who turned psychotic and tried to blow up the
Dwarf.
Note: this 'Actionette' posted with mod approval.