There's many other things than ocelots...

Who: Kevn G Fenard
where: New Russia
when: around then and now...
Kevn was snooping around the landing site, curious about the local
wildlife... him interested in wildlife...he must be high on the donuts
again... He looked at the ground, there was strange little black ant
things. He called over one of the Russians, "What are these?" he asked.
"They are New Russian snow ants, really pesky. They can leave
hundreds of little bites... they aren't poisonous, but they are a real
pain..."
Just as he said that Kevn felt a little sting on his leg, then
another... then another... then another... "DAAAAAHHHH!!! Get em off!"
The Russian started laughing. Kevn was now smacking his legs as
hundreds of little snow ants charged up his legs biting them then
jumping off as if they had done their damage. Soon the Russian was on
the ground laughing histerically, smacking his hand on the ground.
Kevn's legs were covered in little red dots, he even thought he saw
the Orion constelation on his right shin. "Don't worry! Hahaha! Just
wash your legs with soap and they'll... hahaha... clear up... whew!
You are a funny brit!" the Russian couldn't stop laughing.
Kevn stomped off, scratching his itchy legs, grumbling nasty words...
But soon the Russian stopped laughing... because he felt a little
sting on his face, then felt some on his stomach... then another...
then another...