Seymour in prison pt2

Who: Seymour Niples
Where: A New François Prison
When: Three days later
Seymour chalked another number 1 on the wall to mark his third day in
the cell. Despite being the most comfortable cell in the galaxy, he
still wasn't happy. It was like being forced to stay in a comfortable
hotel room, he'd already finished reading the Tom Clancy novel that
had been left in the dresser drawer, but couldn't be bothered to start
reading Harry Potter.
He rubbed his chin which now had three days growth of stubble. "Oh
no!" he said to himself. "I haven't moisturised in 72 whole hours!"
He quickly dashed into the en suite bathroom and rubbed some
prison-issue nivea on his skin.
"Whew that was a close one!"
His cell door opened with a large clang.
A guard came in holding a bottle of expensive-looking wine.
"Is that a Cabernet Sauvignon 2049?" he enquired. "It IS!" he deduced
himself and held his hand out for it.
The guard snatched it away.
"What is this, are you trying to tease me? You're mind games won't
work on ME!" Seymour said, crossing his arms and looking away.
"Because the Prime Minister got away. Hundreds of people on this
planet have now contracted ze Bird Disease-"
"Well that's you're fault isn't it? Nothing to do with me!" Seymour
butted in.
The guard continued.
"I want you to tell me everything you know about ze disease." Said the
Frenchman. "Of the wine gets it!"
A look of pure panic came across Seymours face. "You wouldn't! You
wouldnt waste a perfectly good Cabernet Sauvignon 2049! It's fifty
seven years old for gods sake! '49 was a good year you know!"
The guard tipped some onto the floor.
Seymour screamed. He bent down and tried to lick it, but it had soaked
into the carpet.
"Now look what you've done, its messing up the carpet!"
"Tell me!" the guard poured some more.
"Nooooooooo! Every drop you waste is killing me inside!" Seymour
whined. "I really haven't got anything to tell you I swear!"
The guard poured the entire bottle onto the floor. Seymour fell to his
knees and almost wept.
"Do you know what you've done!" He said.
"Oui," said the guard. "I've just wasted a bottle of coloured water.
You don't really think a Frenchman would waste good wine did you?" he
laughed and left Seymour in his cell.