Jed Calvert - "Jed's selfish decision" pt 3

Who: Jed Calvert
Where: In a cowboy-hat shaped ship, Flying away from the Myra Belle
When: just before the BD time-jumps
"Time for me to get my wiggle on." Jed said happily, and engaged the
small ship's fast cruise engines.
The sudden spurt of speed knocked him back in his chair. "Oooooh yeah
baby giddy up! That's a good girl."
After a few minutes he remembered that this was the ship he'd used to
transport the entire cattle herd in the back, due to the size-altering
rear compartment. At the time he didn't know how to revert the objects
back to normal size, but now found a small lever that made things
larger again.
He searched around for an emergency supply of moonshine and put it in
the rear compartment, then pulled the lever. He pulled out the bottle
and found it now to be twice the size. He was amazed and happy.
"Oh yes, now its time to get as drunk as an Ohio cowboy on his wedding
night!"
**2 hours and an uncountable number of drunken cowboy songs later**
Jed saw something blurry through the windscreen. He whistled drunkedly.
"Wooo, that's the biggest space cow I've ever seen. Or maybe oi've
been bending my elbow for a sunbeam too long." He rubbed his eyes and
wiped the liquor from his prominent cowboy chin.
"Oh me gollies, it's a ship. A biiiig blue one. That's the kind of
thing I'm being after, just think of the amount of smuggled bounty I
can store in something like that!"
As he wondered this in his drunken state, the Blue Dwarf started to
glow, and created a bright glittering wormhole around itself. A
temporal disruption rippled around the ship and it was sucked into the
wormhole, Jed hung onto his small ship and stomach as he was sucked in
also.
Jed vomited into the special compressor/expander in the back, which he
immediately realised he shouldn't have done, as it just created more
vomit.
As the ship stabilised, he looked at the clock.
"Jeezus! Well pin a dress on me and call me my aunt Bessie, did we
just travel back in time?"
He checked the broadcasted news channels just to be sure. They were
warning about a large Hymenoptera fleet advancing on Earth within the
next 48 hours. This was hauntingly familiar.
But Jed's instant reaction was the clap his hands together and say.
"Time to make another killer profit!"
But then he thought about last time. This had been a few months ago
now, instead of maximising the storage capacity of his old ship the
JMC "Fools Gold" for evacuating people off Earth before it got
destroyed, he had used the space for transporting liquor which he
would make a fortune on.
"Everyone needs liquor." He shrugged.
But things hadn't gone so well, his crew mutinied and he had ended up
sat naked on a dessert planet. Something that had seemed to be
repeating itself now, the mutiny part, not the naked part. Jed was
glad of that at least.
The battle with the Hymenoptera wasn't scheduled to start for another
few hours, but Jed watched as the JMC ship and the Space Corps ship
started to fight. He desperately didn't want to get involved, but
there was so much stray gun and turretfire going on around him, that
he was hit by a few stray shots.
A stray shell that was meant for a Space Corps fighter embedded itself
in the corner of his windscreen, it was on a delayed timer so Jed had
a second to read a message on it before it blew.
"Lots of love –Jack."
"Sarcastic plumb-crazy bastard!" Cursed Jed in his Southern American
drawl as the shell sent his ship into a tumble, causing smoke and
radiation to leak out into his cabin.
He coughed and wheezed as the radiation burned through his body,
causing permanent damage.
"This isn't quite the hootenanny I expected." Jed choked before he
passed out.
A Blue Midget fighting the Space Corps fired a grappling hook out to
Jed's ship as it passed, and towed it into the Blue Dwarf's nearest
landing bay.
<To be continued...>