Efof - "Medical Marvel"

Who: Efof Yuwan'Kar
Where: The Space Corps ship
When: After they had first been put in prison
Efof awoke to a strange smell of bleach and medicinal alcohol. His
blurry eyes cleared and he realised he was staring at something …
white…. It was bright… it was a light, shining right into his eyes. He
winced when realising that it was burning his eyes, his reactions
being even slower than usual today.
*Man, I have such a bad headache. Have I been drinking really sugary
Woo-Woo's again?* Efof said, then realised he hadn't actually said it
at all, he had just thought it. He tried to move his hand to his mouth
to see what was wrong with it and realised that he couldn't move his
arms, either four of them.
*Hmm hangon, bright light in my face, all I can see is white… maybe
I'm in the human heaven? I'm definitely not in the Ffionian heaven cos
there's no four-breasted dancers…*
He tried to look around and realised he was laying down. *Definitely
looks like I'm hungover… it explains why I can't feel my legs but why
can't I feel my arms… and where am I… and why is there a man poking a
stick into my sliced open chest?*
It took a few moments to dawn on him that the last comment he made was
actually quite serious. There was a man, a surgeon he hoped, hovering
over him with various medical equipment. And the pale blue skin of his
chest appeared to have been cut and folded back.
Many normal people's reaction to this would be to scream, a bloody
lot. And then to probably squirm and wriggle and try to escape. And
then probably suffer from post traumatic stress and feelings of
personal violation for a very long time. Efof however, was possibly
the most relaxed person ever, and simply cleared his throat and asked.
"Alright guys, are you going to be long, because I really could do
with that fastening back up."
The closest nurse seemed to panic at seeing Efof awake and quickly
grabbed another needle to sedate him. As she did so, Efof continued
"..its just that if you leave my chest open like that I might start to
loose organs when I jog… or people might poke me in either heart for a
laugh…. Or they might think its funny to hide things in me."
The main surgeon stopped the nurse from giving him the extra sedation
and said behind his operating mask. "Give us a second, now that he's
awake he might be useful."
He turned to Efof. "We are a race called Humans... we mean you no
harm…" he said patronisingly slow.
"Yeah yeah" said Efof. "I've been living with humans for about 5 years
now, and I know a few that are a lot nicer than you! And… if you mean
me no harm, why are you cutting my bloody chest open!"
"Are you in any pain or discomfort?" asked the surgeon.
"Well no actually… not right now."
"Well then. We're just trying to find out more about you."
"You could have just ASKED me! Or invited me round for tea… or just
got me drunk, I'll tell you anything then!"
The surgeon ignored his comments and dug into his chest as if it were
a salad. "Can you tell us what THIS does?" he pulled a yellow organ
out of Efof's chest.
"No, I'm not a Doctor! And … could you put that back please, it might
be really important."
But the surgeon ignored him and put it on a plate to his side.
"I… can I have that back? I might need it later…" He watched as a
nurse ignored him and took it away.
The surgeon looked at him again. "You know you are a very fascinating
find. And with the Earth destroyed and no Space Corps command anymore,
there's no one to enforce humanitarian rules. So I can do pretty much
anything I want to find out more about you. Including using this
little baaaaby."
The doctor got out a long thin device with a swab and tiny pincer on
the thin end and a digital display on the thicker end.
"Oh and where's that going?" Asked Efof.
The doctor just smiled. "I'm curious why your species has your
genitalia on your heads. This long end is going down inside your
penis." He made the small pincer on the end open and close.
Efof gulped, and then screamed.